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Comments from wordytom

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Date Story title Comment
2008-09-17 22:42:06 Your story is fair at best. For onbe thing the religious crap does not work the way you have presented it. It is distracting to the story as a whole. You stated this is the best you have ever written. This means either you forgot a cardinal of writing - The reader cannot know what you mean, only what you tell in the story. Or, you are not as good as you believe you are. I think you have the makings of a good writer.
2008-09-19 17:12:25 I'm old fashioned, I prefer consent and cooperation.
2008-09-21 20:53:15 Drinking With My Sister I gave it a negative rating because you do not know what you are writing about. You have a good imagination, but you need more to write a good story. You have a big ego that will prevent you from developing a big talent unless you tame it.

I am hard on you here because I feel you might become a proficient writere is you first learn to write. You have promise.
2008-09-28 11:23:53 I Love Dogs It made me wish I was a dog!
2008-10-04 15:50:37 ~Papas I reluctantly gave you a positive rating for imagination. I suggest you learn more about the human body before you try to write about it.

However, keep writing. that is the only way I know to improve.
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