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This is just a little something a friend once told me and i found pretty funny, you may ofcourse agree or disagree....
People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is buddy, where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?

People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Fuck off. What good is a goddamn cake if you can't eat it? What, should I eat someone else's cake instead?

When people say "It's always in the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the fuck would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

When people say, while watching a movie "Did you see that?" No dick nose, I paid $9.00 to come to the theatre and stare at the fucking ceiling up there. What did you come here for?

People who ask "Can I ask you a question?" Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya buddy?

When something is "new and improved", which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

When a cop pulls you over and then asks if you know how fast you were going? You should know asshole, you fucking pulled me over.

When people say "Life is short." What the fuck?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever fucking does!! What? Are they going to fucking do something that's longer?

When people ask "Can I BORROW a piece of paper?" Sure, but please don't return the favor! It's a god damn piece of paper!

When you are waiting for the bus and someone ask you "Did the bus come yet?" If the bus came I would not be standing here asshole!
16 comments

Anonymous readerReport

2014-08-02 08:33:09
Looooooooooooooolz

anonymous readerReport

2012-10-22 10:40:16
Tumblr is a microblog sormwheee in-between Twitter and WordPress, MovableType. There's a subculture of points and re-blogging cascades that I don't quite understand, but it's important to someone.And yes, Carrington is very very awesome (and worthy of a fuck yeah! )

anonymous readerReport

2012-08-22 01:31:20
that happens al the time to me. hereare more
u walk in to the house soaking wetfrom the ran and people are askingu if it was raining u say no no no everyone decided to spit on me.
also when people 0are like john john john where are you. u respond then run up and ask u if u have seen someone else.

FuckYouAssholeReport

2009-07-21 00:30:05
p.s. yes me again. if anyone agrees with me or wants to add their own, plz do. even if u disagree with me, plz tell me so i know never to mention them again.

FuckYouAssholeReport

2009-07-21 00:28:40
heres some more from u know who (ummm, me).
when girls ask do i look fat in this? who the hell is giving u an honest answer? yeah, u look like a fucking whale.
ppl peeing in pulic. come on, what the fuck do i want to see ur piss for? what the hell?
when random strangers start talking to u in lines. sometimes they even interupt ur conversations with someone else! look, bitch, if iwanted to talk to u i would.
the saying every cloud has a silver lining. um, ok, what the hell is a silver lining? is it good? i think silver is close to grey, meaning rainclouds. a better saying is, eventually every bed will have a hooker in it. i like it.
those ppl who dress up for conventions or movie premieres. wow, ur so cool i just wanna fuck u right now. so hot.
those ppl who go to midnight release parties. see above.
anyone who likes michael jackson.

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