A nice and neatly dressed man is sitting on an airplane next to a woman. An hour into the flight, he pulls out a filthy men's magazine and starts to read it. After a little while longer he removes his hat. Then he takes off his leather gloves. Then he unzips his pants and pulls them down and removes his underwear and proceeds to give himself a "hand job" until he climaxes. Afterwards, he puts away the magazine, puts his pants back on, zips them up, and puts his gloves and hat back on until he is completely dressed again.
The lady sitting next to him has been watching the whole thing and notices the man taking out a cigarette. He turns to her and asks, "you wouldn't be offended if I smoke, would you?"