Joseph Smith loves everyone, even heathen bastard like myself
Over the course of several months, my long-distance relationship with Brandy had hit a snag. Brandy secured employment within an urban sweat shop and began working some seventy hours a week, stitching up cheap clothing alongside a horde of illegal immigrant workers. Due to these time constraints, my scrump buddy discontinued her regular visits to my college campus, causing the frequency of our coitus sessions to dwindle and my quim canteen to run dry. Since my cum dumpster girlfriend could no longer expedite travel to visit me on campus, I convinced Skoal to give me a ride to Salt Lake City for a booty call. My genuine objective behind this visit was to replenish my supply of ass, although I had feigned a romantic longing to see my girlfriend after several weeks of only dating my hand.
Once we arrived at Brandy’s apartment, I set Skoal down in front of the television set, turned on a Barney & Friends rerun for him to watch, and then took my wanton love associate back into her bedroom. Brandy was so happy to see me and so anxious to shed off her clothing that she was naked and rolling around with me atop her bed before she could get her bedroom door closed. I too was quite aroused to see Brandy so I quickly let loose the meat from my pants and was soon nuts deep inside her labia.
During the course of the romping episode inside Brandy’s bedroom, I started to pound her vulva walls thin with the repeated insertion of my massive girth. Although she was a Mormon virgin before I had sunk my super-sized schlong inside her, Brandy’s fiending for my johnson had caused her pussy split to somewhat stretch out over the months that we had been together. Because of this regular wear, moist slapping sounds began to be a more common occurrence during sex with the passing months of regular use of her whisker box. These sounds often caused Brandy to feel embarrassed so she occasionally diversified our regular fucking with alternate activities.
While bumping uglies on her bed in front of the headboard mirror, Brandy decided to spice things up a bit by switching positions and trying something new. She made me lie on my back and then sat on my face in a sixty-nine position. At first, having Brandy’s gash in my face was a welcome surprise, even though her bologna lips were caked with natural juices that had begun to solidify into a rubbery gel around their exterior. Moments after her firm buttocks were pressed against my cheeks, however, I caught a strong whiff of dung from Brandy’s dingy corn hole. The offensive olfactory sensation instantly made me lose my wood, despite the top third of my shaft being imbedded inside Brandy’s mouth. Suffering through the putrid smell, I was somewhat relieved to hear the sounds of voices coming from the nearby living room.
Realizing the intrusion, Brandy quickly dismounted me and ran across her bedroom floor toward the open doorway. I barrel-rolled from off the bed and dived to the floor after her. Simultaneously, Brandy and I grabbed her bedroom door and slammed it shut. We both slid down the side of the closed door and came to rest on the carpet, naked. I was confident that we had shut the door before the intruders in the living room had spotted us.
“Who the hell is that out there?” I panted, out of breath.
“Mary,” Brandy replied. “My roommate. She wasn’t going to come over this early. Darn it!”
“Mary? That girl with the inverted nipples? She’s still living with you?”
“Yes! I told you that!”
“You told me that she moved out two weeks ago and that you’re staying here all by yourself now!”
“Well, she’s not all the way moved out yet. She still has some of her stuff here. She’s probably just coming by to get another load of her things. But I told her to wait until tonight so I could be with you.”
I stopped to listen to the commotion taking place on the other side of the bedroom door. “There’s other voices out there beside your roommate and Skoal,” I said. “Mary apparently brought over some company with her.”
“That’s got to be her family.”
“It’s Sunday. Shouldn’t they be at church, praying to Joseph Smith or something?”
“The ward house is just down the block,” Brandy explained. “She probably stopped by with her dad’s truck to move some of her stuff since they were already in the area.”
A knock was suddenly heard at the bedroom door, startling the both of us.
“Oh no!” Brandy said, placing her face in her hands.
“Who is it?” I asked through the door, doing my best to mock a feminine voice.
I stood up and cracked the door open, being sure to conceal my glistening tube steak out of Skoal’s view. “What’s going on out there?” I asked my friend. “Who’s out there?”
“I guess it’s your girl’s roommate.”
“Who’s with her?”
“It’s her parents I think,” Skoal replied. “Dude, let’s just get out of here. This is not cool. I don’t know any of these people and I don’t wanna sit out there and talk to them while you’re in here fuckin. I feel dumb.”
I thought for a moment and then suggested, “Why don’t you take Mary in her bedroom and entertain her. Maybe you can get some play too. She has inverted nipples, though, so be careful.”
Skoal looked confused. “She has crooked titties?”
“No, dude,” I said, explaining the breast deformity with a series of finger gestures to my retarded dorm mate. “Her nipples are inside out. Just go suck on them and—”
“Don’t tell him that!” Brandy said, smacking me in my back from behind. “She’ll know that I told you! That’s supposed to be private.”
I looked over my shoulder to Brandy, who remained huddling behind me in the nude. “So? She’s gotta fix her cones somehow. Why not have Skoal help her out? He can suck a—”
“Her parents are here!”
“So what? He don’t care.” I looked back to Skoal. “You don’t mind boning Mary while I finish what I’m doing in here do you?”
“Dude, I just met her.”
A look of disappointment bore upon my face. “I thought you had game, man. Well, whatever. Just go occupy her or something. Keep her busy. Talk about the Book of Mormon. I’m not done in here yet. When I’m finished, I’ll let you know.” I motioned Skoal away with a flap of my hand while closing the bedroom door. “Go on now,” I instructed. “Go get some of your own, you cock-blocker. Go on...”
“We can’t stay in here like this,” Brandy said, once Skoal had returned to the living room. “It’s rude and Mary’s going to know what’s going on.”
My testicles began to throb with a serious case of blue balls setting in, which seemed to be commonplace with my interactions with Brandy. “Well,” I pontificated, “maybe we don’t have to stay in here.”
“Where else are we going to go, Keaton?” Brandy asked, as she started gathering up her clothes from off the floor.
As she was bending over to collect her garments, I rested my eyes upon Brandy’s luscious ass. Just as my wood was beginning to oak up again, I remembered that her booty had a serious stench problem and was infected with dookie crumbs. “Let’s go into the bathroom,” I suggested. “We can just take a quick shower.”
Brandy looked at me with a lusty grin. “Okay,” she said coyly, dropping her clothes.
With Skoal entertaining Mary and her Mormon parents out in the living room, Brandy and I slipped further down the hallway and entered the bathroom. Seconds later, we had relocated to the shower. While Brandy stood beneath the pressurized stream of water from the shower faucet, I soaped up her dung hole from behind. Once her orifices were all Sunday morning fresh, I slowly slid my thick love inside Brandy’s rectum and initiated the backdoor hustle. After her initial pain from the anal penetration had subsided, I groped onto her breasts like jockey reigns and began to pump my girlfriend’s dooty shoot like an oil rig. With her ass being much tighter than her worn out coochie, I quickly swelled up again, ready to blow my wad. Seconds before my rectal rooter erupted inside her Brandy’s colon, the bathroom door swung open and in marched Mary. She was steaming hot and all sorts of salty.
“What are you doing in here!” Mary yelled.
“...Just taking a shower,” Brandy replied in a strained tone, as she tried to push my orgasm stick out from her dirt star.
“I cannot believe this!” Mary hollered. “My parents are here! You are so gross. I’m so glad I’m moving out of here! I can’t stand to be around you. You’re such a slut!”
Covered with soap suds, I withdrew my Barack Obama from Brandy’s Hershey highway and pulled open the hazy shower door. With my massive meat probe ominously protruding forward, I leaned a little out of the shower and said, “You wanna join us, Mindy? There’s room in here for one more.”
Shocked to the core of her being, Mindy stared at me with her eyes wide open. She glanced at my erection and then looked back at my shit-eating grin. In a sudden about-face, Mindy spun around and slammed the bathroom door behind her.
“I think I’m in trouble,” Brandy said, turning off the shower.
I raised out my hands in a confused plea. “What’s wrong? Who cares that she’s mad. She’s moving out as we speak! You’re never going to see her again anyway.”
“She’s right, Keaton, this was very rude.” Brandy stepped out of the shower and reached for a towel.
“It’s not rude,” I said. “Mary’s just mad because no one wants to hook up with her. She’s fat and has inverted nipples so she can’t get any. Skoal’s available out there. Why don’t she get with him?”
“She’s not fat!”
“Well, that muffin top sure doesn’t add to her hour-glass figure any.”
Brandy began drying off her moist body with the towel and I feared that my spermatozoa would be trapped inside my nuts for another long duration. To circumvent this issue, I stepped out of the shower, soaking wet, and approached Brandy with my pooper poker, which was still holding strong. I backed her into the counter and then lifted her up onto the sink. With her legs spread and wrapped around my waist, I penetrated the Mormon girl once more and implemented a series of long thrusts inside her. Moments later, my glans exploded a thick stream of white goo up across Brandy’s stomach and chest. I released a sigh of relief and then toweled myself off.
While I was shifting the towel between my shoulder blades, I heard commotion from the hallway. I made out Skoal’s voice amongst an older male’s whom I figured was Mary’s father. Although I could not decipher what was being said, I gathered that my retarded friend was taking the heat for my lasciviousness. It was time to make a quick exit.
With my hair in a damp mess, I strutted out of the bathroom with only a towel held around my waist. I looked down the hallway toward the living room. Mary’s parents were seen staring back at my bare chest, both of them sharing looks of dread. When Brandy, wearing only a towel, stepped out of the bathroom behind me to shuffle down the hallway toward her bedroom, I detected a slight hint of jealousy in Mary’s father’s expression. With a wink of my eye toward Mary’s parents, I turned away from them and reentered Brandy’s bedroom behind her.
As soon as I had my clothes back on, I strolled back out into the living room. “You ready to roll outta here?” I said to Skoal.
“Yeah, dude, let’s blow this place!” Skoal replied, jumping up from the couch. He promptly exited the apartment, leaving me alone with Brandy, Mary, and Mary’s parents.
“Hi, everybody,” I said to Mary and her parents with a half-assed wave. “I’m Keaton. You probably won’t ever see me again but I hope I didn’t ruin your impression of me. I normally don’t do this sort of thing. I usually only have sex in the bedroom.”
“So I guess I’ll be leaving now,” I announced, walking toward the door. With my hand on the doorknob, I whisked around and caught Brandy’s eyes with my own. “Baby, I’ll be seeing you... later.”
Brandy buckled her knees together and blushed as I left the apartment, thoroughly satisfied with my conquest.