The Badendorf Family History
By Emerald Green
Warning: The following history contains adult material. If you are not an adult or if adult themes offed you, you should read no further.
• The Next Day and the Next
The next morning when Otto awoke he felt chilled by the winter cold that had penetrated his room. His mind was not clear as he became aware that he had awakened in his own bed rather than at his Uncle Hans’ house. He then noted he was not wearing his nightshirt. Suddenly the memory of what had happened with Cat flooded his mind. He had sex with his sister. How had this happened? He had resolved to not let it happen. It had happened because he was too weak to stop it. He hoped she was not with child. If no one found out she would not be disgraced. He quickly dressed in his woolen clothes. If only his father was not so frugal that they could not heat by anything but cooking fires.
He rushed down to the kitchen which was the only warm room in the house. He greeted his mother and sisters as he warmed his hands by the fire. They each kissed him on the cheek. When Cat kissed him their eyes met. He expected to see guilt or shame but instead he saw the same adoring look that he had always seen in her eyes. He was sure nothing had changed as far as she was concerned. He would have continued to warm himself by the fire but his bladder insisted upon being emptied. He went to the coat rack beside the entry door where he found a heavy great coat which he slipped on.
Lisbeth called to him before he closed the door behind him, “Don’t freeze anything.” He heard his mother chide his younger sister. As the cold winter air penetrated to his core he again told himself that what had happened with Cat should never have happened and it would never happen again. Upon his return to the kitchen he was served a freshly baked hot roll that was liberally spread with salt lard. As he enjoyed the roll and a cup of tea he watched his sisters as they worked beside his mother. They worked well together. He suddenly had a revelation that there was no outward way to know if a woman had had sex the night before.
When he entered the print shop that occupied the front of the family home he was greeted by his father, “At long last you get up. Your mother would not allow me to wake you on your first morning home. Be assured that after this day you will come to work with me.”
“Yes papa,” Otto responded as he stepped in to take over at the flywheel of the printing press.
“No Otto. I will do this by myself. The package on the counter must be delivered to the head clerk at city hall. It is already paid for.”
“May I wear your coat or should I get my own,” Otto asked his father.
“You think you are big enough to wear your papa’s coat. Yes wear it.”
On his short walk to city hall and back he was welcomed back after his two year absence by several people. For instance the woodcutter’s sons were delivering a load of fire wood and he knew they would spread the word of his return but the one of most interest to him was the baker’s daughter who had come out of her father’s bakery to greet him. He knew she had long been interested in him and now looking at how she had developed in the past two years he knew he could develop a similar interest.
Upon his return to the print shop he wished he had the courage to ask his father to let him go warm his hands in the kitchen but he was sure his father would deny his request and make some remark like, “Good hard work is the best warmth.” He stepped into his usual position where he could keep the flywheel spinning at the speed it should spin. Again he remembered the “Thank you” he would have received from his Uncle Hans. He received nothing from his father.
The job he was doing allowed him much time to think. He played the memory of what had happened with Cat last night. He again resolved it would never happen again. It was definitely pleasant. Just the feel of Cat’s body beneath him was memorable but inserting his… His thoughts were interrupted by his father calling his name. He realized he had begun to spin the wheel too fast. He slowed the wheel to the proper speed and realized also the memory of what had happened in his bed last night had excited his body. The rest of the morning he was able to keep his mind on the job. He did wonder how his father could work beside someone and never feel the need to talk. He missed the stories his uncle would tell just to pass the time while they were working.
During their midday break for a quick meal of sausage and beer Otto wished he could ask his father about the proposed marriage between Cat and the butcher but knowing that his father always refused any conversation that he did not initiate he kept his silence. He was sure he knew what his father would say anyway. It is custom for a man to marry his eldest daughter to the most prominent and richest eligible man in the community. A man gained reputation by how well he married his daughters, especially his first. Yes, Otto knew the customs of his people.
The afternoon passed as the forenoon had but unlike last evening they found their job done before the lanterns needed to be lit. As usual mother only needed a few minutes warning to have dinner ready. Also as usual the women did not eat with the men. He remembered back when he was too young to be considered a man he ate with the women before his father, his grandfather, and their apprentice. Since his grandfather died five years ago his father had not been able to get an apprentice so Otto has started working beside his father at a young age.
Like yesterday Lisbeth could not keep from stroking Otto’s hair. Also like yesterday, papa told Lisbeth to stop bothering her brother and stop treating him like a lover. Every time Otto and Cat’s eyes met it was as though she took time to say, with her eyes, I love you. Otto was afraid someone else would notice. He looked around and saw that papa only looked at his food. Momma only seemed to look at her cooking. Lisbeth was the only one who might notice Cat’s apparent devotion to Otto but then the younger girl was apparently trying to attract his attention. He studied her when she was not looking in his direction. She was heavy but very beautiful. In their society the heavy people were considered the healthiest. They were the ones who survived hard times, disease, and plague.
When papa finished eating he rested back in his chair and closed his eyes. Everyone knew he was not sleeping but only resting. Otto quickly finished his second helping and momma placed a large plate on the table which held many small cookies. Momma and the girls sat at the table and nibbled on little cookies. Momma said, “Otto, tell us about Uncle Hans’ family.”
Otto had already told himself it would do no good to tell about how much he preferred working with Uncle Hans and that Little Hans was afraid to come with him. He began, “As you know Uncle Hans is a printer like papa. He often has an apprentice. He already has one to replace me.” At this point papa cleared his throat and everyone looked to him but he did not appear ready to say anything so Otto continued. “Gisele manages the house like momma and like momma she takes care of the young ones very well.”
Lisbeth asked, “Has she been promised yet?”
“I wasn’t privy to everything but I don’t think so. I did overhear a man ask Uncle Hans but it was not my place to eavesdrop so I do not know anything more.” Papa cleared his throat again. Otto continued, “Little Hans is a most obedient son, always doing what his papa asks but little really does apply to him. Little Hans is going to be a small man I think. Georg is almost three years younger than Little Hans and he is almost as big. Also, I should not tell on him but Georg is mean to his brother, getting him in trouble when he can.”
Papa cleared his throat and asked, “Did you like working with Uncle Hans?”
“Yes papa,” Otto said, hoping that his father would not pursue this further.
“Does Little Hans work with his papa?” papa asked.
“Not much yet, he is still young,” Otto said, trying to defend his cousin.
“Not so young. If he were working with his papa he would grow. When you were his age I had you working with me. A man grows into his work.” Papa leaned back and closed his eyes. Everyone knew he had had his say.
Otto continued to tell about life at his uncle’s house and answer his sister’s questions.
That evening when Otto went to bed he wondered if Cat would come to his room again. All day he had planned to tell her not to but he had not been able to be alone with her so that he could. Just as he was about to drop off to sleep he heard his door open and close. He had resolved to tell her to leave before she said anything. A soft voice called his name. It was not Cat; it was Lisbeth.
“What are you doing here?” he asked.
“I…I wanted to tell you…” She bumped into the foot of his bed and her hands encounter his feet through the quilt. She quickly came around to the side of his bed. “It is so dark. I wanted to tell you how nice it is that you are here. It is so dull here with just papa, momma, and Cat.” Her hands found his face.
“And I am entertaining?” Otto asked. She did not answer him with words but with kisses. She kissed him all about the face, avoiding his lips. After a few moments Otto said, “Papa would accuse you of being a loose woman.”
“I am loose,” she giggled, “I do not have anything tying me down.” She began kissing him below the ear and down to the collar bone.
“No papa means you are acting like a whore,” Otto said, thinking that the word whore might cause Lisbeth to think more about what she was doing. He was surprised by her response.
“If I was a whore, I would know what sex is like, wouldn’t I brother?”
Otto was dumbfounded by her answer. He was actually afraid to answer her question. Her lips met his and she tried to give him an open mouth kiss. He kept his lips tightly closed. This is how last evening went wrong, he told himself. He turned his face away from her and she began kissing him below the ear again. “Stop, Lisbeth, stop!” he said.
“Why should I stop? Don’t you like me kissing you?” she asked.
“Lisbeth, I am a man. If you keep doing this I will act like a man. I will take you. I will rape you.” He knew he had to be blunt with her.
“Will you really?” She continued to kiss below his ear. He was surprised that his words of warning were not working. Then she said, “I would know about sex if you raped me.”
“I would hurt you and you would get pregnant,” he responded hoping to bring her to her senses. “You would be disgraced and no decent man would have you.”
“I so wish there was some way to learn about sex without getting pregnant,” she said.
“There is not so, go back to your own bed and let me be because it is hard to resist being a man,” he said, feeling he was maybe getting to her.
“You are right, but…”
“But nothing,” he interrupted, “you go to your room right…” She kissed him on the lips, interrupting him. He turned away and said, “Go now before I start shouting and wake papa.”
She inhaled as though she was startled he would think of involving their father. Now her thought was that her brother did not understand her feelings. He could only think of himself. She straightened up and looked down at him. She could not see him but that meant he could not see how angry she was at him. She had to tell him, “I am angry with you, very angry.” She turned and left.
He told himself that it was better that she was angry with him than for the same thing to happen with her as had already happened with Cat. He turned to his side hoping he would be able to get to sleep without doing anything to relieve his sexual tension. He believed what he had been taught that it was harmful to relieve sexual tension the way young men often did.
He heard his door open and close. He asked himself, did she come back after all? When she had moved to the side of his bed, Cat asked, “Why was Lesbeth in here?”
He had to be careful what he said. “She was telling me how papa is mean to her.”
“Yeah she is always complaining to me and momma,” Cat said as she bent down to kiss Otto.
He rolled to his back and turned his face away from her. He said, “No Cat, we cannot keep doing this.”
“I must be sure I am pregnant,” she insisted as she slipped under the quilt beside him.
He turned his back to her as she moved up close to him.
“Cat, get out of my bed or…” It had worked with Lisbeth. “I will wake papa and momma and tell them what you are doing.”
“You will not do that.”
“I will Cat and papa will beat you,” Otto said.
“I will tell him what you did to me and he will probably kill you,” she said indicating she could not be bluffed. She reached over him and under his night shirt to find his penis.
“God Cat!” he exclaimed as he attempted to pull away from her. They struggled like children playing at wrestling. She was more determined than he was so before long he found himself above her with her legs wrapped around him. With her pointing his penis in the right direction and pulling with her legs he found he was entering her. He repeated, “God Cat,” as he gave up resistance and pounded into her.
When he had filled her with all the semen his testicles held he fell to one side angry. Not at her but at himself. How could he permit this to happen. She was kissing him about the face and neck but he was trying to ignore her like he should have before. “Cat, this must stop. If you persist I will be forced to run away and you will never see me again.”
“And where will you go?” she whispered in his ear before nibbling on his earlobe.
“I will go to Penn’s Forest,” he said proud that he knew of a place to go.
“Where is Penn’s Forest?” she whispered as she kissed below his earlobe.
“In English America,” he said.
“How would you get there?”
“By ship…ships leave Rotterdam nearly every day bound for English America,” he explained as he felt his anger subsiding.
“Would you take me with you?” she asked.
Her question caused his anger to return and he said, “I do not want to go but if you do not stop coming to my room I will. Now get out now!”
She continued to protest his ultimatum but after a few more minutes she said, “Good night,” and returned to her own room.
The next day passed about the same except he had an opportunity to tell each of his sister to leave him alone and not come to his room. It was nearly a week later that Cat came to his room after he had fallen asleep. She slipped under the quilt beside him and before he realized what was happening she was on top of him. Just the presence of her atop him, kissing his face caused him to instantly get hard. His youthful but manly male member jabbed at her and she immediately moved over it and bore down. Again he found that once he was in he lost all resistance.
After that night Cat returned nearly every third night for more. He no longer resisted and they rarely talked. About the middle of March she announce that she was pregnant so they did not have to do it any more if he did not want to. “I have come to want it even though I know it is wrong,” he said as he moved between her legs.
Once finished he collapsed beside her ready to fall asleep. “I am telling momma tomorrow that I am pregnant. I will refuse to tell who the father is even if papa beats me.”
“Cat, how can you do it? I should have never allowed you to do this. Papa is going to be angry.” Tears came to his eyes and a lump came to his throat.
She kissed him and said, “I love you dear brother,” before sliding out of bed and slipping into her nightshirt.
True to her word, Cat told her mother that she was pregnant. Her mother at first did not believe her but once she had become convinced she became hysterical. She screamed at Cat and cried in shame. Lisbeth came and asked what was wrong and her mother said, “The world has ended.”
LIsbeth turned to Cat for an explanation and Cat said, “I am with child.”
Like her mother Lisbeth refused to believe her sister but soon she had become hysterical as well.
Otto in the shop with his father could hear the loud voices and he looked to his father who made no indication of noticing. Then suddenly papa called out, “Stop!” Otto used the emergency stop on the wheel. Then papa said, “Clean the ink,” and stormed out of the shop into the house. Otto did what his father had told him because he knew the importance of cleaning the ink off the machine before it dried. Before he was finished with his job he heard his father roar like a wild beast. His father’s roar was joined by women’s screams. Otto knew what was happening. He had seen his father strike out when he was angry. He had on more than one occasion received a sudden slap from his father. But Otto was sure that Cat was on the receiving end of more than on slap. Otto wished he had the courage to go and attempt to stop his father but the truth was he was a coward. He would never stand up to his father.
Otto found he did not even have the courage to go see what was happening. Instead he waited in the shop dreading being called to come into the house. He was suddenly surprised by the return of his father. He asked, “Papa, what happened?”
His father, red faced and slightly winded, said, “Nothing that concerns you.” He began to apply ink to the ink pad and Otto began to spin the flywheel as though nothing unusual had happened.
At midday papa told Otto to wait in the shop instead of going to the kitchen for the midday meal. Otto did as he was told. Soon papa returned and sat on a stool at the bench. Within second Lisbeth arrived with a tray containing their food. Otto could see that she had tears in her eyes but she did not look at him. Papa waved Otto to sit on the second stool at the bench and they ate in silence. When Otto finished his sausage and beer he started to ask his father what had happened but his father held his hand up as if to say he was not going to say a thing. They worked all afternoon and long after it grew dark outside. When they did stop and go to eat dinner, only Otto’s mother was there to serve them. He could see her eyes were red with tears. As soon as papa finished eating he announced, “Bedtime.”