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This is my first story.. would love feedback!

I woke up lifting my head up and all I could see was darkness. I was standing and my arms and legs were restrained. It is chilly and I Realized I am completely naked. I hear an owl then I feel a breeze and smell the crisp night air. I am outside! How did I get here? The last thing I remember was I was walking to my car after my night class, and I remember nothing else. Someone must have drugged me and taken me here. Where am I? I start crying. I am not sure what is going to happen to me. I am hanging there on the tree for a while, then suddenly the moon comes out behind a cloud and I can see now, I am in a forest and strapped to a tree! I look to my side and I see a shadow of a tall man he walks towards me. I start begging for him to not hurt me; he just laughs quietly and walks up to my face. He has a hood on so I can not see his face. He tells me I am his now and he will do whatever he wishes to me, if he wants to hurt me he will. I start crying again and I feel a huge hand slap my face. He tells me I better shut up and not make a sound or I will feel pain. I hold in my tears and stand there cold, shacking, not sure what was next. He gets a branch from the ground and pulls his arm back and I scream. He starts violently smacking my breasts with the the stick and in a stern voice tells me if I make another sound he will gag me, but I couldn’t help it I started crying. He stops and gets a round ball with a strap out of a bag he has on the ground and ties it around my mouth. Now I can’t speak, cry, or scream.

He starts putting his gloved filled hands all over my body, pinching my nipples running down to my belly back up then back down and next thing I knew his fingers where in my pussy. He starts to laugh and says you are very moist, I think you like this torture. His other hand goes around to the back of my head and he pulls my hair hard telling me I am his slut now and no one will ever find me, he owns me just like he owns his dog. He pulls out his fingers and rubs my wetness on my belly. He gets in his bag and pulls out a blind fold. I start to squirm but he smacks me hard on my face again. He puts the blind fold on me and says now I can take my mask off and you will not know what is coming next. I feel something big shoved up my pussy stretching me I have no clue what then something starts going up my ass, I want to scream but can’t, it wasn’t as big as what went up my ass but it still was stretching my ass wide open. Then I hear him walking away and says you better keep both those in side of you until I return. I stayed tied to the tree for what seemed like hours with both my holes full. My ass was loosening up and I felt what was in it slipping out and tightened my ass tighter but finally it fell out. He finally returns and starts yelling at me and pulls my head back with my hair and says you let it fall out! Since your ass seems to have stretched out I guess its time to give it something bigger. He pulls out the huge object in my pussy and shoves it up my asshole, I want to scream but can’t. But he doesn’t stop there he pushes in and out fast as he can ripping my tight ass hole apart. Then he gives it one last shove and says I better keep it in there until he pulls it out. He loosens the gag on my mouth and shoves something in it, it tastes funny but I have no clue what it was and he says there you go, clean your ass off this. It was what was in my ass first. I sucked it clean as I was told in hopes I would not get punished anymore. I feel something tight on my nipple then on my other nipple it was so painful, they were being pinched. Next I felt something go around my throat it was tight and cold, and as he pout it on me he said now I am collard just like his dog. I am his dog now.
He starts to untie the ropes from my arms then my legs and I just fall to the ground, I was so weak from being there so long. He then tells me to get on my hands and knees and gives me a big whack on my ass with I think was a stick. He said there that is the position you should always be in just like a dog unless told otherwise. I start to cry again and he starts spanking me hard on my ass, this time it was his hand. Whack back and forth on each check, he did this for what seemed like 20 minutes. My ass was so sore, but I managed to keep the object up my ass he had in it. He finally pulls it out of my ass and shoves it right in my mouth. Suck it clean whore, your mouth is now used for cleaning anything I want cleaned! I sucked it clean as I was told. Then he sits it to the side. He then shoves his cock up my ass, without any warning and fucks me hard as he can as he pulls my hair. I felt like such a used whore, and then I felt my pussy getting more wet. OMG I am about ready to cum! How can I cum, I am being rapped! He thrusts harder inside of my now stretched ass and tells me I am not allowed to cum, I am there to please him only. A few more thrusts and I feel my ass full of hot cum. He pulls out and shoves it in my mouth and tells me to clean his cock and calls me a good cock sucking whore. He pushes me on my back and holds my arms down and sits on my face and demands that I lick his balls clean and then his dirty ass. I lick them as I am told and he forces his ass on my face and I clean it, he yells and tells me to shove my tongue up his ass and I do far as I could, gagging but doing it. I tongued his ass for at least 30 minutes he gets up and pulls me by my collar and I Feel a chain being attached to my collar. He puts me back on my hands and knees and walks me around the woods, I can’t see anything, and if I slowed down he pull harder and chokes me. I hear water approaching. He takes off my mask then the nipple clamps I now see he had attached. It was daylight now and I look up and I can see his face. He was handsome actually I thought. I couldn’t believe I thought that about my rapist! He pushes me into the lake and tells me to clean off from head to toe. After I was done cleaning I came out of the water and he pushed me back to my hands and knees and led me back with the leash. We get back to our spot and he tells me to stay and he gets in his bag and gets a bowl and some bottled water and pours it into the bowl and tells me to drink, drink just like a dog and I do I was so thirsty. He then puts me on my knees and tells me to open up wide and starts fucking my mouth with his semi hard cock next thing I know it was hard again and he is gagging me, it’s all the way down my throat. I couldn’t breath! He pulls it out and throws me on my back and starts fucking my pussy. I was so wet at this point it went in quickly and he shoved it in with no mercy and fucked my pussy hard as he could at the same time he was smacking my breasts so hard I thought they were going to fall off, at this point I wanted to cum so bad and he could tell and he said in an evil voice I am not to cum! He starts thrusting harder and harder and fills my pussy full of his hot cum and I couldn’t help myself I exploded with him.. He pulls out and tells me I must keep my cum inside me until morning or I will be punished. He walks up right above my face and says here is your punishment for cumming and he start pissing all over my face, hair and tells me to open wide and I do and some goes into my mouth. He laughed and called me a good toilet. He pulls me up by my leash and ties me to the tree but this time he ties ropes around my already swollen sore breasts and reminds me to keep his sperm inside of my cunt until morning. He walks away and says he will be back in the morning..

anonymous readerReport

2012-12-25 17:19:55
Decent story, but there are several quite obvious spelling mistakes, the structure of the writing is sloppy and the story doesn't quite flow as it seems to jump from one bit to another, like you got bored of writing that part and moved on...anyway maybe you should get someone else to read it as it could be a whole lot better if you revised it with someone. Also, shouldn't there be a kind of lead-up to the whole kidnap thing because it is kind of a plonk in the middle of a street and get raped. Also if she was drugged shouldn't she be feeling a little drowsy and disorientated, not "oh wow I'm naked and there a man next to me, hey mister!!!"

anonymous readerReport

2012-02-11 22:59:41
pYxkEG As I have expected, the writer blurted out..!

anonymous readerReport

2011-02-21 17:34:48
Sloppy. The structure was diffucult to read. There were several technical errors.

I suggest paragraphs, and better dialogue structuring could help the readed wuite a bit. Other than that, I really enjoyed it. work on your structuring and this could be a very good story.


2011-02-07 12:11:11
Your structure is sloppy. You need some paragraphs and more story flow.

anonymous readerReport

2011-02-04 20:35:16
Not much dialoge.........

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