Hopefully this is something you will enjoy from a slightly different perspective.
How does an affair start?
Does it start the day you meet someone or does it start weeks, months or even years earlier?
How long do you endure the neglect before you circumstances lead you in to a secret bliss?
It's 5:30 in the morning.
My husband has been gone since 5 to catch the train downtown to work.
I sit in my satin robe in front of the window with my coffee in hand as I have done many mornings now.
My hair still a little wet from the shower. The robe clings to my skin and it reminds me that I have nothing under.
Nor have I ever worn anything under, even before I met you.
I feel an anxious anticipation building inside of me.
I look out the window and down the street waiting to catch a glimpse of you.
I noticed you running by my house in the early morning hours a few months back.
You had just passed as I walked out to get the paper. I don't even know if you saw me.
Still, there was something about you.
The next day I didn't see you at all. It was the day after that timing worked out for me.
As I reached down to get the paper I saw you turn the corner to my street. In only a few strides you were passing my house.
We exchanged hellos and you continued on your way. I looked back toward you as I walked in to the house and I thought I caught you looking back at me. Maybe it was the fuzzy long robe I wore to get the paper in the chilly morning?
Maybe it was wishful thinking?
Though I do think I'm pretty good looking for a 41 year old woman. My hair is medium length and brown. There are a few grey hairs I would like to rid myself of. It has a light natural curl to it. My skin is slightly tanned and shows signs of years in the sun. And though I don't work out really, I maintain an average womanly figure. At 5 feet 7 inches I only weigh 140 pounds. I have my softer spots that I would always love to tone more but don't seem to put the effort in to. My breasts are as perky as they used to be, nor my stomach as flat. I can't seem to rid myself of the small pouch that formed after I had my son some 19 years ago, but my breasts are still full and only sag a little with my ever present erect nipples (another side effect of having kids). My legs are long and somewhat lean. There’s that bit of flab in my thighs that doesn't seem to go anywhere either. All-in-all I try to convince myself I'm pretty hot.
I stand on the porch for another minute as you round the curve at the far end of the street.
I start to wonder where you live, if you are married or if you even find me attractive.
The weekend passes and I don't see you. Maybe on Monday I will have that luck again.
Sure enough I see you pass by closer to 5:45 this time. I thought I saw you look toward my house and wondered if you saw me standing there?
I walk out to get my paper in time to see you turn the bend and I feel a little cheated.
Two days later I am ready. I walk out just before your normal time. I get to the sidewalk and reach for the paper. But you are missing.
I stand there undecided on what to do. Do I put the paper back and try again? Do I just go inside and hope to see you run by?
I am about to go inside when I catch you running out the corner of my eye.
I quickly look up at the sky, as if checking the weather.
"Nice day today", I comment as you run by. Then instantly think of how stupid that was to say.
I am usually more social than this.
"Why yes it is", you reply with a tender smile and I think a wink.
My heart pounds a little in my chest and I get a girlish smile.
I continue to watch as you run down the street and I notice you look back. I raise my hand slightly to wave and I see you nod.
"You're an idiot", I tell myself as I walk back in to the house. What was I doing?
I was a married woman, and yes I have felt neglected for the past several years, but what did I really want to do?
Did I just want to engage in innocent flirtation to make me feel more a woman?
Did I really want to go past a simple hello?
My heart was still a flutter when I entered my house. I would have to rethink my intentions.
Still, two days later I found myself lying in bed waiting for my husband to leave so I could shower and be waiting walk out as you run by again.
I felt almost addicted to your presence, even as irrational as that was. I missed seeing you run by on those odd days and weekends often left me feeling empty.
I poured myself a cup of coffee and walked to the door. I stood in the doorway peering out through the closed screen door.
I thought I saw something and quickly walked outside.
As I got to the sidewalk I noticed I still had my cup in hand. I reached down to get the paper as I saw you.
I needed something better than the weather to say. My head was scrambled. I felt a knot in my stomach. What would I say this time that would sound stupid?
As you drew near I could see the smile on your sweat laden face.
"Morning" I greeted.
"Morning to you" you huffed back.
My brain was straining for something witty, but what blurted out was "Coffee?"
Coffee? Really? He's running, not going to Starbucks.
I guess my out outburst was as confusing to as it was to me.
I saw you slow and stop, and then look back at me quizzically.
"Excuse me?" you posed.
"Yes, I'm a dork" I said to myself. Even you are looking at me like I'm crazy.
As you took a couple of steps back toward me I had to think of something.
"I'm sorry; I just thought you might like something to drink." I tried to recover.
"Coffee was the first thing that came to my mind, though water might be more appropriate." I retorted with almost a pleading in my voice.
I could see the sweat dripping along your face, your shirt soaked in patches, your legs long and lean.
Your confused look turned to a smile, such a beautiful smile. "Water would be great, thanks." You replied.
My heart skipped a beat. I was stunned.
Then I realized I was just standing there.
I started to walk back to the house while you just stood on the sidewalk.
"Here, come up to the porch" I offered.
You did a quick look around and walked up to the porch.
I went inside and yelled out to you as I got out a glass, "Ice?"
"No thanks", you replied.
I quickly got the water and returned to the porch.
You thanked me and I just stood there, taking you in.
Even covered in sweat there was something sexy about you, something masculine.
I stood there with my left hand across my midsection, my right hand playing with the upper front of my robe. My fingers running up and down the fabric, even slightly pulling it away from my skin. "Do you run far?" I asked. I felt almost like a schoolgirl with her first crush.
I swear I was blushing.
"I try to do 5 miles, 3 times a week." you reply. That explains why I don't see him every day.
"Is this your halfway mark?" I inquired.
"No, pretty near the end. I'm just down the street there" you said as you pointed around the corner.
"You're up pretty early" you state.
"I usually get up right after my husband leaves for work. Gives me a little time to relax." I said without thinking.
Great, now you know I'm married.
But I am married, why did I want to hide that?
"And have coffee?" you questioned with a smile on your face.
I saw your eyes looking me over and I blushed.
"Something like that" I replied and dropped my head embarrassed.
Then I realized that my hand playing with my robe had opened the top a ways and most of my breast was exposed.
I quickly closed my robe, my face hot from the blood rushing to it in shame.
"Sorry about that" I quickly responded.
"It's OK", you assured me. "Thanks for the water." you said as you handed me the glass.
I could barely look at you as I took it from your hand.
I watched with my head hung low as you descended the stairs and started toward the street.
Then I saw you turn back to me. "Oh, and very nice." you said with a lift of your eyebrows and smile. Then you resumed your run down the street and around the corner.
I wasn't sure whether to be embarrassed or flattered?
The next few times I tried to compose myself a little better.
I met you on my porch with a glass of water at the ready.
I found out that you were married and had 2 young kids.
I told you about mine being in college.
You told me you ran to try to stay in shape as well give yourself some quiet time as a stress release. You said it was this or a cold shower.
I think I got your underlying meaning.
I told you how I enjoyed my quiet morning times, but often felt alone and often neglected.
Though wasn't sure why that came out. It really no relevance to our conversation.
Maybe I was fishing, wanting to put thoughts in your head.
For two weeks we conversed in the early morning. Sometimes I would catch myself playing with my hair, other times playing with my robe.
Did you know I was naked underneath?
I could feel your eyes upon me as I moved the fabric. I cherished it, lusted after it. I always felt alive after our meetings.
Then you were gone for a week. I watched for you, but you didn't show.
I felt my heart ache. Had I said too much? Did I do something wrong? Was I being rejected by someone I barely know?
The following week my heart sprang again. I opened my shade and saw you picking up my paper.
I felt a little giddy at first, like being picked up for my first date.
I quickly adjusted my robe to cover me and opened the door.
You were just putting the paper on the porch when it opened.
"Just thought I would drop this here for you", you said.
"Thanks", I replied. "Would you like to come in?" I offered.
You looked at your watch then said, "I guess, for a minute."
I offered you a glass of water, which you accepted.
I told you to have a seat on the couch while I got it. You were a little reluctant since you were covered in sweat.
I told you it would be fine.
My heart was racing, my hands felt shaky as I poured your water.
You were here, in my house!
I fought to compose myself.
I walked out and handed you your glass.
Then sat down on the other end of the couch wrapping one leg under me.
I felt my robe on my slightly extended leg; the other end fell with curled leg. I knew I was nearly exposed and it excited me.
I told you how I was hoping everything was OK since I had not seen you running last week.
I hoped you wouldn't think I was stalking you or anything, but the thought of walking down the street to try to find you did cross my mind.
You explained how you had to work late a couple of nights and you were trying to catch up on a little sleep.
While you talked, I let my hand play with my robe again.
I felt my skin with my fingers as I ran them along the seam.
I heard you talking and watched your eyes dart from me to the floor and back.
I realized that I had been rubbing between my breast and almost down to my stomach. My robe was open, showing the inner regions of my breasts.
I don't know what came over me then. I shifted myself and let my hand fall to me leg.
I tried to make it seem like an accident as I brushed the material from my thigh.
I knew I would be fully exposed if you looked.
And look you did. You stopped mid sentence with your eyes transfixed between my thighs.
I was caught.
You quickly looked at your watch and stood up.
"Uh, I have to get going." You stated.
"What have I done?" I screamed in my head!
I had screwed everything up. I was embarrassed, disappointed with myself.
I stood wanting to explain something.
"I'm sorry, I don't .." I tried to speak.
I dropped my head in to my hands.
"I'm such a fool" I continued.
I was about to speak again when I felt him step close to me.
I felt his fingers on my chin pulling my face up to meet his eyes.
"No, I mean I have to get home, before I am missed." he said.
Hi blue eyes searching inside of me.
"Wednesday maybe I'll take a different route so I have more time for, um, coffee or something." There was a raise of his eyebrows and a slight smirk on his face.
Then he reached down and kissed my lips.
I was electrified!
Then he opened the door. "See you on Wednesday", he replied.
I watched as he ran down the street.
I felt a surge inside of me.
It had been years since a kiss had aroused me so.
I quickly retired to my bedroom to release the pleasure brought on by this man.
And now here I sit, sipping coffee waiting on our return as promised.
Then I see you. You've come from the other direction this time.
You are almost a half an hour earlier then before.
I watch as you retrieve the paper and walk to the door.
My heart is pounding, palms almost sweaty.
I move to the door to await your knock.
There is anxious giddiness throughout my body.
Then I hear the light taps.
I start for the knob.
Then I pause and quickly adjust my robe.
I let it fall open slightly. I am now exposed for you and only you.
I open the door and stand before you.
You enter. I can see the delight in your face.
"Morning" I say.
"Morning to you" you grumble.
As soon as the door closes you step to me.
I feel your arm reach out and pull me in. You are not sweaty as before.
Then I am aware that your arm has reached inside of my robe to pull me in to you.
Your skin is against mine. My robe opened further.
As our kiss parts, I ask "Coffee". My smile ever present.
"No" you reply, "Just you."
We kiss again and I lead you to my bedroom.
I am looking forward to my mornings even more now.