Losing your virginity is often a topic that concerns and scares young women a lot

Losing your virginity is often a topic that concerns and scares young women a lot, causing anxiety and even an overwhelming fear of any attempt at physical intimacy. A whole range of myths and inaccuracies about your first time can be the cause of this. A good knowledge and understanding of your anatomy and bodily functions, as well as some self-practice before the "big day" are essential in order for you to lose your virginity painlessly and pleasurably. The misconceptions of the hymen. Most people believe the hymen is a piece of flesh that will necessarily break, cause pain and bleed the first time a girl has intercourse. This is a myth. The hymen is a membrane that covers part of the vagina's entrance. However, it has a hole in it, from where menstrual blood flows to the outside. An adolescent girl's hymen is either likely to have broken through the practice of sports, masturbation or insertion of a tampon. Even if not broken, the hymen's hole will have have stretched enough by the time a girl is about to initiate intimacy, resulting in only very mild pain and little bleeding (or none at all) when the male genitalia is inserted. On the other hand, you might bleed a lot. This is also normal, so don't be scared.

So why does it hurt a little? The truth is that the possible breaking of the hymen will play a very subtle role in terms of pain felt during your first time. In most cases, it is the muscles inside of your genitals that may cause discomfort and pain. The myth that your first night is always painful can cause these muscles to subconsciously tighten and spasm, causing penetration to be much more difficult and painful than necessary. It is the nervousness and misconception of first-time penetration that causes it. But don't worry because there are ways to overcome it naturally and easily.

Most importantly, you must be sure you are ready to take this step. Remember that the initiation of a sexual relationship with your partner will change things, most likely from a teenage-love stage to a much deeper and intimate sort of relationship. Also, make sure that you (and even your partner) are not being pressured to take this step. If you decide you don't want to do it, you have the right to simply say 'no' and be respected for it.

So, for those who have just arrived I shall begin at the beginning.

New Story of virginity

am 22-years-old and lost my virginity about four months ago. Maybe I have a distorted perception since I know several people who got pregnant during high school, but I feel like I lost my virginity at a later age than most people. There isn't a particular reason why I hadn't lost my virginity until four months ago. I wasn't saving it for my future husband--I've never really seen myself as getting married anyway. It's not something that I considered as sacred. I just never had a boyfriend before.
In contrast to either losing your virginity at a younger age or losing your virginity to the person you got married to because you chose to wait, I feel like losing your virginity at an older age is different when you weren't saving it for someone special in the first place. I could be very wrong, but when you lose your virginity at a younger age, you also seem to accept earlier that the person you lost your virginity to most likely won't always be in your life. You're young, with new people bound to enter into your life, with others bound to exit. Perhaps your virginity wasn't something you considered to be all that important anyway. Maybe you were just curious. Either way, you move on.

At the other end of the spectrum, most of the females I know who I haven't lost their virginity at my age are waiting until they get married, so they believe that they'll always be with the one that they lost their virginity to. It's just how they've planned things to be. They also don't have to deal with awkward situation of running into the person they lost their virginity to, but are no longer with.

I'm not really sure where I'm trying to go with this, but I lost my virginity at an age older than most of the females I know, but it's not because I was deliberately trying to save it. It's just because I had never been in a relationship before. Now I'm no longer a virgin, but the guy I lost my virginity to is no longer a part of my life. We still run into each other a few times a week because we live in the same apartment building, but we never acknowledge each other; it's as if we've never met. It's such a strange feeling and I can't seem to get over the fact that I lost my virginity to a guy I still see weekly, but don't even talk to anymore.

I didn't really expect to him be a huge part of my life, but I didn't really expect him to be completely cut out like this either. I see myself as being in the middle of this spectrum: the people who didn't really care about their virginity and lost it early, and the people who value their virginity and lose it later after marriage.

my best friend wants to have sex with her boyfriend over the summer. we're only 14 and i don't know how to tell her it's stupid.

anonymous readerReport

2013-03-31 00:27:35
This really helped me, thank you! -Scared virgin

anonymous readerReport

2012-05-19 20:32:36
An interesting start, but you did not connect the dots in your train of thoughts. nor sid you connect or complete your last thought.

anonymous readerReport

2012-05-19 05:56:39

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