I have been fighting with myself about "being in Love" ever again let alone being in love with my best friends wife. The feeling is wonderful but the inevitable fall is devastating.
It was the inevitable fall that really flooded my thoughts when my phone rang and I saw that it was Amy. Sometimes we want or have to ignore the things that make us uncomfortable, the things we don't want to deal with.
I have done that for weeks now by ignoring Amy's repeated attempts to contact me but I had an epiphany, at least I think I did but then again how can I tell the difference between epiphany and apathy right now.
Pushing the answer button I calmly spoke,
"Hello", I answered.
"I'm surprised you answered me, why are you ignoring me", Asked Amy.
"I've had a lot on my mind lately", I said.
"So you fuck me, leave then ignore me ?, It made me feel worthless and".............,Amy began to say as I cut her off.
"YOU TORE MY HEART OUT AND THREW IT AWAY THEN CALL TO GET TOGETHER AND TREAT ME LIKE WE NEVER HAD ANYTHING MEANINGFUL SO DON'T PREACH TO ME. YOU WANTED SEX THAT NIGHT AND YOU GOT IT", I said in a very loud tone.
There was silence on the line except for some slight sniffles from Amy. I was mad and my short rant cleared things up for me and I realized my apathy was my epiphany. The lack of having feelings or considering others feelings is liberating. When I expressed what I just said to Amy wasn't from the heart rather it was from anger, I was angry at myself for being stupid enough to believe in things like, "love, heart, feelings, commitment", etc. This is all a sudden reversal for me considering Cindy and the feeling I have, had, thought I had, whatever, for her.
I was fooling myself again and I just had to suppress it, forget it and try to figure what Cindy and mine's exit strategy would be. In other words how do her and I deal with our "feelings" and our expression of love, in word and actions then move on or away from it ?.
I was waiting for Amy's response so I could fire back again, I was loaded and could shoot her stuff back at her all night if need be.
She finally spoke,
"So now you are acting like we had nothing by treating me like this", she said.
She didn't express it in a mocking fashion but was making a statement, a statement in which a response was expected.
Damn, I thought, she had me on that one. A wrong to serve justice with another wrong is just that, a wrong. I was cocked and loaded and now find myself with no response. With me now being silent she spoke again,
So you are showing me that I meant nothing to you OR.............(she paused) you now have feelings for someone else ?.
I had to shoot back so I did,
I'm done with feelings and all that shit, it causes nothing but pain and trouble", I said.
I wanted to get off this subject because I had to bury and hide my feelings for Cindy. I had to get over it and let this thing die down and go away but I had no intention to hurt Cindy's feelings so I had to figure a way to exit with integrity and feelings intact between Cindy and I. For all I know Cindy has been thinking the same thing.
"David, let's get together and talk. There are unresolved issues we need to discuss", she said.
I couldn't let that one go and this was my chance to steer this conversation in another direction,
"Yeah, we did that already didn't we", I said.
"This would be different, she said.
Brad and Cindy had a party planned and since Amy would obviously be going, as well as I would, she wanted us to meet and talk prior to that party to ward of any awkwardness
We hung up with plans to "get together" again. She wanted to tonight but I suggested tomorrow evening. I needed time to think and reconcile what was inside of me. I knew that the best way to get over one is to get under another and the circumstance with Cindy filled that, for both of us.
I knew I couldn't get back into a meaningful relationship with Amy, or possibly anyone else, but if there was resolution then perhaps her and I could move on.
I think this is why the thing with Cindy was really tolerable for me because I knew from the start there was a built in end to it. I have had those feelings though but this was the only way I could make sense of it all. Self analysis was all I could do or is it fooling myself.....is there a difference ?.
If Cindy and I were to "part" (meaning our sex sessions were done yet our feelings for each other were intact) then as long as it could be resolved like that then I knew I would be OK but it was important for me to know that she would be OK. This was totally different then the situation between Amy and I. She just plain dumped me in the middle of a serious relationship.
If Cindy and I were to just end it without some resolution then that breeds contempt, then anger bubbles up then revenge................
My original worries were now coming back to me and I knew I/we had a fine line to walk.
This time Amy came over to my place, there was no dinner planned so I didn't have food prepared plus I wasn't in the mood to take her out or anything like that.
I was confused and split between having feelings and not having them, between letting them surface and keeping them buried. What a mess I have made for myself, why did I fuck Cindy ?. After all this time I'm now feeling guilty because I fucked my best friends pregnant wife, yet another damn feeling. I can see where feelings can get in the way yet a lack thereof can cause trouble Hell, having them can to.
Having sex with Cindy was an opportunity and I took it, feelings had nothing to do with it at least from the start. I could have turned her down and went on undressing her with my eyes for the rest of our lives and things would be as they had been for many many years.
My thinking was interrupted by a knock at the door. I opened in and expected Amy to be decked out in another hot little dress, not this time though. She had on jeans and a purple silk top, she was "dressed down" (if that was possible) but the jeans only accentuated her curves and they were not the form fitting skinny jeans either. Her top didn't have a plunging neck line but it was sleeveless and she had her long dark hair pulled back and fastened and had no makeup on.
She had the innocent "girl next door" look going on. If she would have had on a pair of glasses she would have the "hot librarian" look going on. All she had to do next was put her hair in pigtails, throw on a checkered red button up shirt and she would be the "farmers daughter". The heat was instantly building in my groin just looking at her.
I wasn't sure if she "didn't dress" up because of her mood and she didn't want to convey she was a hot temptress or if this was yet another way to distract me with the hidden hot innocent look or if she really wanted to dispense with the whole act and really tried to dress down and let passions rest.
Either way it wasn't working for me, her look was turning me on but the look on her face and her demeanor was telling me she was serious and down to business.
We sat down and actually had a long serious talk, we hashed out feelings, (well her feelings mostly), troubles, wants, wishes, the future, etc.
I wasn't being forthcoming obviously because of the Cindy/Brad situation but Amy was leading the conversation in many areas. When we crossed things that made her cry I would hold and comfort her but it appeared she was holding something back.
"David, after talking with Cindy the last few months about you I know I messed up what I had, what we had", she said.
I looked into her eyes which conveyed sorrow however, she was also looking into my eyes and searching. I really didn't have a response and I began to sense that all her talking this evening wasn't really her confessing rather she was questioning me in a subtle way, she was seeking answers from me without just asking specific questions.
I wasn't giving her the response she was seeking so she began to speak again,
Cindy speaks so highly of you David, it confirmed the things I really loved about you and the more Cindy talked the more glowingly she talked about you", she said.
"Well we have known each other for a long time", I said.
"Did you and Cindy ever have anything going on back in the day", she asked.
"Nope, her and Brad were an item off and on back then", I said.
Amy looked at me quizzically while slightly nodding her head.
"I just got the feeling that you two were close I mean the way she talks about you".......her voice trailed off as she shrugged her shoulders.
I felt that my face went flush but at least now I knew where she had been steering the conversation to all evening. If her and Cindy did all the talking she claims then she would obviously know it from Cindy if her and I had anything going on back in the day.
"You know, I confided a lot in Cindy when you and I were together and the last few months she sounded like me when she talked about you", Amy said still looking at me quizzically.
"Well there you go, she's known me for a long time, assumed anything she didn't know and you confiding in her filled in the gaps plus it was probably just her attempt promote me to you", I said.
I didn't like where this was all going but I was quick with an answer I figured would dissuade her from further inquiries.
"Yeah, I guess", she said as she continued to look straight into my eyes.
While I couldn't help the blood draining from my face I was able to pull off a nonchalant return stare. She knew something at worst or suspected something at least.
"Kiss me", she said.
My eyes darted to various points of her face for a few seconds before I leaned in and turned my head. Our lips met and with one quick smack we slightly pulled away then instantly pressed our lips together again. This kiss was longer and we each applied more pressure. She put her arms around my neck and mine went around her back, I sucked in her top lip then went to her lower one and sucked it in.
I was instantly horny and my need was outstripping sensibilities and detachment, I wanted sex now and figured I would justify or put it into perspective later.
Our embrace tightened and she was pulling me onto her as she tried to lay back on the couch. I broke the kiss,
"Lets go to bed", I said. As I pulled away my hand ran down her arm until I had her hand in mine while I stood up. She sat on the couch looking up at me, it wasn't a pensive look rather she had a slight look of what I sensed as pride.
She also had to pause for dramatic effect or to play innocent, I wasn't sure which it was maybe both but either way I wanted to have sex with her.
She stood up and I turned to pull her with me but she remained stationary. I turned to look at her and she eased up to me grabbed my face and gave me such a soft warm wet kiss that caused me to melt.
I was in a hurry but she was slowing things down, it worked.
Although the fire inside me was raging even hotter my pace was slowed down as we stood there and gently yet passionately kissed.
We pulled away and looked deep into each others eyes, my hand went to the side of her face then I let my fingers stroke her long dark hair.
Her soft brown eyes captivated me, damn she was beautiful and sexy as hell plus she truly was a good woman. A woman with faults but hell, we all have those and if the good outweighs the bad then what's not to love right ?.
We walked to my bedroom at the edge of the bed she gently pushed me back onto it then got on to the bed and straddled me while unbuttoning my shirt.
Upon opening my shirt she leaned down and started kissing my chest and worked her way down to my stomach.
Then she straightened up and started to unbutton my pants, pulled the zipper down and tugged at the waist while I raised my hips up as she finished pulling my pants off.
I laid on my back and my boner had my boxers tented out. Amy got off the bed and began to undress while I laid there and watched. She stood there with nothing but her french cut panties and bra on then turned her back to me taking them off then turned to face me in all her naked glory. Not a tan line anywhere, her body was flawless.
She got back onto the bed and immediately pulled my boxers of, pulling them down also dragged my cock down then once clear of the waistband it sprang straight back up.
She straddled my legs and took my cock in her hand massaging it up and down before leaning down. She pressed her lips against the tip of my cock and let it part her lips. I swallowed hard and leaned my head back while groaning and arching my back up as she continued to descend onto my boner.
She took me in very deep then slowly worked up and down my shaft, she pulled back up keeping her lips firmly around the my head and started to suck hard before releasing and plunging back down until her lips was brushing my pubic hair.
With my cock in her throat she swallowed,
"OHHHHHHHHHHH", I groaned loudly. The sensation was incredible and the slow loving care she put into the experience was certainly keeping my inner fire raging while at the same time tempering the explosive force contained in my balls.
I wanted to grab her head while she worked yet I couldn't. She was in control and all I could do was keep my hands pressed beside me on the bed while my back was arched up as she continued to slowly work on me.
After several minutes of sheer pleasure she pulled back up my shaft while keeping firm suction. I opened my eyes and picked my head up as she pulled off of leaving a string of saliva between the tip of my dick and her lips which finally snapped as she gently rose.
I let my head fall back onto the bed and breathed with relief as I relaxed every muscle in my body. I didn't even realized until then how tense my whole body was.
Amy leaned over me and crawled up towards my face then straightened up her body as she positioned her cunt over my face.
She was looking down at me while I stared at her cunt and as my tongue left my mouth she lowered herself to meet me.
I teased her with the tip of my tongue which caused her to shudder, putting my hand on each of her hips I pulled her closer and raised my head slightly while I worked my tongue into her slit.
Peeking up at her she had her eyes closed and her head hung down until I went deeper into her cunt. She opened her mouth slightly while raising her head up then back, she stiffened her body then,
"uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh", she breathed out as I worked her cunt with my tongue. Her stomach went into spasms and as she started panting, her whole body began to shake then she suddenly tensed up, stopped breathing then her body relaxed her head was hanging way back and she let out a long breath.
While it wasn't a flood her cunt was suddenly creamier than when I started and I lapped at her cunt tasting her juice while she came back down to earth.
She leveled her head, opened her eyes then scooted down to my waist. She leaned over me and brought her face to mine and we kissed deeply. When she pulled back she licked my chin with one graceful stroke, tasting her own juice.
She raised herself up while taking my cock in one had and guided it to her dripping cunt and impaled herself onto me. Planting her hands on the bed beside me she leaned over and began to slowly move herself up and down my hardened shaft while rocking her hips back and forth.
She worked with slow deliberate passion and with about every other stroke she squeezed my cock with her cunt muscles. We looked into each others eyes and all my hardened reserves melted away with what I saw in her face.
While she made love to me she leaned down and we kissed deeply, my hands went to her breasts and I squeezed each one before I ran my thumb and forefinger over her nipples and slightly pinched them.
We broke our kiss and she raised back up into a more prone position while my hand left her luscious boobs and ran down to the top of her hips and I held on as her back arched inward. She raised up higher and pulled herself off to the tip of my cock before plunging back down onto me as she sped up her lovemaking.
Without a sound from her I felt her jizz wash over my cock and drip off of my balls. I was getting closer myself but with the heat of her cum and the renewed wetness I stopped holding back and let cum rise up my shaft.
My breathing picked up and as I was getting closer to my blissful release I laid my head back and closed my eyes while digging my fingers into her hips.
As the cum neared the tip of my cock I tensed every muscle around my waist and raised my hips slightly as I took in a huge breath and,
"OHHHH, OHHHHH, OHHHHH, OHHHHH, OHHHHH" I groaned out as my cock convulsed and steadily pumped boiling hot cum up inside of Amy's gripping cunt.
With our lovemaking now reaching it's conclusion Amy stopped riding me, she dropped herself down to bury my cock deep inside of her while her cunt continued to squeeze and milk me.
After a minute she pulled off of me then leaned down for us to kiss. We embrace and rolled onto our side while we continued kissing.
When the kisses stopped we laid there holding each other. I was amazed at her passion and sensuality tonight, her and I have had many sessions like this before but the passion we put into it was more intense then almost any other time I remember.
With my need met and the fog of hot passionate sex now removed I was getting my resolve back. We laid there holding each other and although she felt so damn good I suddenly wanted to exit the situation.
I was struggling with myself again about these moods and feelings. Was it was protection I was seeking or was it more than that, I was not going to be hurt anymore. I wanted guilt free, commitment free sex plus protection for my heart.
The only way to do that was to never get close to anyone again yet have sex when it was needed. I guess I wanted to have my cake and eat it to.
I began to think about all of Amy's good traits versus the bad. Sure she ripped my heart out but the her good (not just the sex) was far outweighing the bad.
I was in turmoil.....turmoil my ass, I was in Hell. I was ripping myself apart inside by thinking about things such as commitment, marriage, sex, kids and how nice it would be to build that life then upon analysis all the bad associated with that would cause me to instantly shift back to hunkering down, keeping guard and staying at arms length forever.
I knew what I needed, I needed to pull back from everything and everyone to have room so I could think without distraction and undue influences. I had plenty of vacation time to take and felt I could go out to the wilderness somewhere to be just to myself and take a hike, go fishing, etc or even camp out on an island somewhere and fish, walk and reflect.
Amy broke my thoughts,
"David, do you think we can ever get back to where we were" ?, she asked.
I didn't want to answer that now because I couldn't but I had to say something and I really had no intent on hurting her feelings or dashing any hopes she may have.
"I don't know Amy............it's not because of you either. I have to reconcile things with myself first", I said.
I truly did have to think about it and resolve my own internal issues and I think she senses that but I can't be sure. I am suspicious about her motives, her talking about feeling earlier this evening was really a line of questioning now that I had time to think about it.
This was getting heavy and I needed that time away and fast.
With Brad and Cindy's party still a couple weeks away I knew the time for me to go was right. I was fortunate that I could schedule my own vacation time on short notice.
"Amy, I'm going to take some time off work and............leave", I said.
"Where you going" ?, she asked.
"I don't know yet, someplace I can be ALONE" !, I said.
"Should I leave you alone....tonight ?, she asked.
Not moments ago I was wishing for an exit after our lovemaking but now it didnlt seem to matter to me and didn't mind if she stayed. I had my thoughts and was fine with her laying beside me all night if she wished. I turned my head to her,
"You want ot stay tonight" ?, I asked.
"If that's alright", she said.
I nodded my head in approval and laid my head back, she turned to me and snuggled closer and buried her face to the side of mine and draped her arm over my chest. I laid on my back looking up and let the thoughts run through my head until I drifted off to sleep.
I was slowly coming out of sleep but it was to soon to realize why. My eyes blinked open and it was still dark and I simply sensed it was maybe 3am or so in the morning. I was on my side facing away from Amy then I realized my cock was rock hard (nothing unusual there) then as I became more conscious I felt Amy gently pulling on my cock.
I always hated to waste a hard-on so I gently rolled onto my back, Amy wrapped her hand around my meat and began to pumped up and down. I laid there enjoying the feeling and I was still shaking the weakness of sleep away until I could mount her.
I started to lightly grunt then moan and groan with pleasure, she suddenly scooted down taking the cover off with her movement and positioned herself.
She took my cock in her mouth,
"AHHHHHHHHHHHH", I moaned out in sweet relief. I was super hard, so hard it hurt and her wet warm soothing mouth actually eased the pain somewhat.
Amy bobbed up and down with more intensity now, she wasn't being gentle and what initially eased the pain of my engorged cock now started to hurt as it expanded even more.
If she would have scrapped her teeth against my cock I swear it would have popped like a balloon. I knew it wasn't just from her stimulation but I also needed to piss however, I wasn't going to stop this action for that, I wanted to get inside of her.
Amy pulled off of me,
"Would you fuck me in the ass", she asked.
I didn't say a word I just sat up and got on my knees, while she laid on her back. As I moved into position she raised her legs up and placed her ankles on my shoulders.
I leaned in towards and over her, aimed my throbbing tool at her cunt and pushed in. I was once again soothed by the soft inner folds of her already dripping twat.
I pushed in until I bottomed out and started thrusting, going deep with every stroke. I wanted to coat my cock with her jizz. After fucking her cunt for a minute and making sure her juices were flowing down her crack, I pulled out and rubbed the head of my cock up and down between her entire slot then down to her brownie hole.
I positioned myself at her hole and pressed against it, surprised at the ease in which my cock head entered. That ease stop as her anus clamped down around the flare of my head.
She grunted while I continued to push my cock in while she tightened even more and brought her hands up to push against my waist. I was delirious with lust and need plus I needed to ease the pain of my fully engorged cock.
She was never able to take my entire cock in her ass no matter how much her and I tried. I wanted to be fully inside of her ass but I was always able to control myself before but right now I was blind with want and I was also devoid of feelings at this time or repercussions from simply having my way and being satisfied.
While I still was not going to just rape her like that I would not ram it in either however, I was not going to be denied my wants anymore. I was inching my way in by gently pumping in and out then ease in more and more.
She attempted to impede my progress but it was no good. She pushed against me with her hands and legs to keep me at bay. I leaned over her harder and forced her legs back.
While I continued to pump I temporarily stopped putting more inside of her,
"Easy baby it hurts", she grunted in discomfort.
I continued to pump while she grunted with each of my strokes. Her hole was creamy wet and she eased her anus muscles and let me work,
"OHHHHH BABY, OH BABY IT FEELS SO GOOD. I got to have my whole cock in your butt", I said.
The feeling of her hole stretched around my engorged cock, the thought of being where we are "not supposed to go" and difference in sensation of her as as opposed to her cunt was to much for me.
I braced myself, scooted my knees closer and leaned in. With the muscles in my entire body tensed I pushed more cock into her,
"UUUUHHHHHH JEEZUS, UH, UH, UH, she moaned, groaned and grunted.
I had half of my cock in her ass which is about all we were ever able to do before but it has been quite awhile.
"It's alright baby, relax and give it to me. I'm gonna get it all the way in", I said.
"NOOO, NOOO, I CAN'T TAKE IT", she screamed.
Although she was loud it wasn't true pleading and if she resisted to the ultimate extent then she could stop this whole thing. At least that's what I was sensing or making myself believe. I was woken up in the middles of the night, my dick hard as a rock and she asked me to fuck her in the ass. This didn't give me license to hurt her, rape her or anything like that but sometimes these situations are exactly like this.
They want it and a lot of times they like to be taken, held down, forced and to feel helpless while they are fucked. The fear and/or played fear and helplessness enhances the experience and pleasure while they play like they are keeping some dignity and innocence intact instead of appearing to be an out and out whore or slut.
Society, although quickly changing, still bounds a woman's expression of sexuality and nastiness they wish they could openly display and still be "respected".
"You can take it baby, we're gonna get it done this time.", I said while I pushed in past the halfway point.
She tensed up drawing a quick breath,
OOOOWWWWW, UHHHHH, OHHHHH, she groaned then clamped down tight on my cock.
The feeling of her anus squeezing me was incredible.
"OH GOD BABY THAT FEELS GOOD", I moaned while continuing to pump.She remained tensed and worked every muscle in her body due to the invasion.
"It will be better if you relax", I said.
I knew it was not possible for her to just relax but what else could I say. I wanted her to ease up and just let me run it in to the hilt and experience the pleasure.
"Your fucking me David, it hurts", she whispered. I imagine a whisper was all she could do, it sounded like he had no breath.
"I know Amy, I know. I can't stop, I just can't", I groaned out in sheer pleasure.
Pleasure from the feel of her brownie hole squeezing me and also from being unleashed with animal lust that resides in all men.
I was holding her into position and succumbing to my desire and she was "pleading", it was all just to much to going on at once to cause me to stop.
I said to myself that she wanted this and I was justified in my efforts to "be the man" and just take what I wanted and let her go about her life and living with being ravaged by the beast that I am.
"I never seen you like this", she said. I could hear the worry in her voice.
"Uh Huh", was all I could respond. I increased my strokes and inched more dick into her butt. The further down my shaft that her anus gripped the harder I thrust. I was going to feel her with every inch of my cock then I intended to unload deep inside.
Amy continued to grunt and groan while I fucked her in the ass. I was out of control and only the smallest shred of empathy was still inside of me but I was convinced that while she was experiencing discomfort she also wanted me to ravage her.
I was so close to being all the way inside of her now and the feeling of her anus following the contour of my hardened shaft was exquisite.
My balls were boiling and cum was working it's way up causing a tingling sensation. My usual instinct would be to clamp down my cock muscles and hold off the inevitable but at this point if I would had then the feeling would have went away. I knew she couldn't take only so much of this assault on her asshole and I badly wanted to cum deep inside plump butt.
The only thing that would bring me on now was to speed up so I did just that while still forcing even more inside of her. The pressure inside me was rising with the sped of my fucking.
I fucked faster,
I was running out of energy and my muscles burned with fatigue but the pleasure of having cum spurt from my peehole kept me working. Just the thought of cumming caused the pressure in my cock to rise to the top, now my instinct did take over and I squeezed my cock muscle to build more pressure and pumped faster.
No longer willing to contain it,
"I GOTTA CUUUUUM", I yelled.
At peak pressure I finally drove in the last inch of cock which caused Amy to let out a high pitch scream. This sent me over the top, I was fucking her, filling her ravaged asshole with my monster cock, the cock she loved, the cock she wanted, the cock that gave her the most pleasure she has had in her life.
Hey, we all dream this dream and that is the part that men think when we are taking that "helpless" woman.
With her screams, my thoughts and delusions and the feeling her anus was giving my meaty tool I finally let go,
"OHHHHHHH", I groaned as cum streamed from my cock and began to fill her up.
I panted a few times trying to catch my breath while remained deep inside of her and let loose,
"UHHHHHHH", I moaned with pleasure and relief as another stream. I could fell my own cum forcing it's way out around my embedded cock but I remained deep in her because I new I had another large load left to expel,
"AHHHHHHH", I moaned as the pressure inside my shaft was diminished. I still remained deep in her and grunted as my cock convulsed and sprayed the remnants of my seed.
I could feel my cock soaked in my own cum as I held it inside of her butt and came down from the short high from the feeling of all that cum exiting my slowly deflating cock.
Amy was lightly moaning and I knew I needed to withdraw my cock from her sore asshole. She was still clamped hard on my cock as I pulled out. I was deliberately slow because it felt so damn good. When the tip of my cock was almost out I quickly withdrew.
My dick was holding back a flood, cum shot from her ass and pooled up on the bed. With the initial pressure relived more cum bubbled out of her and ran down her crack.
I knelt there observing this with pride thinking about the amount of cum I shot out. She eased her legs down as I back away from her. Then she got up and went to the bathroom, I remembered then that one reason I was so hard when I woke was that I had to piss and the feeling caused my dick to return to hardness. I rushed into the bathroom as she was about to get off the toilet.
I stood in front of her with my dick straight out.
Keeping her head level she raised her eyes up to look at me. I eased closer to her and she leaned down taking my cum covered cock into her mouth and sucked hard as she worked my shaft until it was clean. My eyes closed in pure pleasurable torture. I had to piss so bad it hurt and her mouth was about to cause me to release,
"BABY", I blurted out as a warning.
After a few more seconds she pulled off, grabbed my dick and aimed it at her chest just as I let go.
"AHHHHHHHHHH, OHHHHHHHHH, MMMMMMMMM" I moaned in relief as piss left my peehole.
She was gently waving my cock left and right to cover her entire chest with my continuing stream of piss. I couldn't believe this shit. What has come over Amy, I mean we have talked about "doing nasty things" but she was showing me a much different and more provocative side to her.
With my stream slowing, I squeezed a few more times and it was done. She let go of my dick and I stood there with my eyes closed for a few seconds then opened my eyes and looked down.
Amy had a mischievous look as I continued to stare at her, then she smiled and stood up and walked to the shower and turned on the water to get it warmed up then proceeded to clean up the piss that splattered on the floor.
I wasn't sure what to make of this, ALL this. I couldn't make out her motive or motives. I was confused because it appeared she was pulling out all the stops, really trying super hard to show me another facet of her character, a lure or something. It was like she was in a competition, she had an objective, she had purpose.
Thank goodness I have vacation because I really needed to get away and contemplate. Amy insisted we talk once a day but I would have nothing of it. She didn't like it at all but to bad. I did speak with Cindy prior to me leaving and we discussed "things" and she certainly understood and she admitted she was having internal struggles as well. She was questioning her entire existence and situation and we agreed that when I got back that her and I really needed to talk.
We both realized we can't help what we feel and we have to figure out how to live with certain things that would not be realized. This was another factor I would have to reconcile within myself and was likely the foremost thing on my mind during my "get away".
I got things right in my mind, expectations in check and feeling sorted out. It was during the day so I figured Brad would be at work so Cindy was the first person I called when I left and started to head back to town,
"I'm glad you called me, I've been dying to hear from you, are you alright" ?, she asked.
"I'm fine, I needed this for myself, except (ha ha ha), I trailed off with a laugh.
"Except for what", she asked.
"Well going without sex for a week is typically not a problem but I guess being out in the middle of nowhere and just knowing it wasn't available makes you want it or feel you have to have it", I said.
"Can I help or....is it something that you would have Amy take care of", she asked.
I worked around that question as we continued to talk but even with my alone time the last week there were things that would take further time to resolve and sort out. The last week was not to resolve all issues, the purpose was to clear my head of daily static and clarify things so I could deal with them going forward.
Cindy wanted to talk and suggested we get together today. Brad was out of town and her mother had the baby so we made plans to meet albeit out of town. She would drive in the direction I was coming from and we planned to meet in a small town about 30 miles away from the city.
Amy knew I would be back today so I intended to call her. She called me several times during my hiatus leaving several heartfelt voicemails. I've never seen Amy like this before and again, she was pulling out all the stops.
Since I didn't expect to be seeing or spending time with Cindy today I called Amy and told her I would be on my way back shortly and be home tonight.
Amy was desperate to see me and wished I could be in sooner but of course I lied about my departure and arrival because I didn't know until minutes ago that Cindy and I would be seeing each other this afternoon.
Cindy and I met at a restaurant and had a late lunch while we tried to talk. This was by far the most uncomfortable meeting and feeling we ever had. I didn't know if it was lasting feelings, sexual frustration, us meeting out of town or all the above.
We each tried to talk but couldn't find the words and when we couldn't find the words we found each others eyes. We spent more time looking into each others eyes then talking.
I was still suppressing feelings so my words were limited and Cindy was dancing around an issue or he was also suppressing feelings. It was like our eyes were telling each other that we had feelings and desire but there was sadness, sadness that the future was bleak. We knew it couldn't continue and it was conveyed without words.
We each had to seek individual relationships and revert back to the way things were and live with things that could never be.
Like she had finally summoned courage Cindy began to speak,
"David, I have been talking to Amy this week and I am convinced that she loves you and wants to be with you.........and HAS been with you", she said.
I felt like the accused all of a sudden and that I was guilty but it really wasn't that, there was another reason and I knew where Cindy would be going with this.
When Cindy said that my eyes dropped to the table like looking down in shame, I couldn't look at her so I just nodded my head yes.
Sex with Amy was really an attempt at total detachment from Cindy not to mention filling a basic need on my part.
I was without words so Cindy spoke again,
"You act like you feel bad about it", she said.
"I know it's stupid", I said.
"Look, you two have feelings for each other, nothing wrong with that", she said.
"I don't have feelings for her, not since she dumped me. I tried and can't get them back", I said looking right at Cindy.
Cindy's eyes went wide upon me making that statement. She had the look like she was holding back a huge follow up question or had a statement or maybe it was the look of worry.
"But, But...........I thought....... I mean she said......things can't be.......we can't...........", she continued stuttering and could not put the words together so I did it for her.
"I can see the worry in you're face, also concern and disbelief. I know things can't be what you and I feel we want but you can ease the worry because I don't need one to get over another, isn't that what you are worried about" ?, I asked.
"I have been working on this thing between you two before I had the baby, I timed it for her to be at the hospital when you visited, I preached to her about you for weeks, months now in fact", she said in an exasperated tone.
"I appreciate the attempt and I understand the purpose but it's not needed, I'm a big boy", I said.
"YEAH, I know you are", she said with a mischievous grin.
"I don't think you were trying to do something for me as much as you were trying to make me out of your reach", I said with a raised eyebrow.
Cindy had a gleam in her eyes and I could almost sense her pussy suddenly getting moist as she shifted her position and wiggled her butt on the chair. I had hit it right on the head so before she could say anything I spoke again,
"SO, you asked me if you could HELP me since I've done without for a week. Is the offer still on the table" ?, I asked.
Cindy didn't say a word rather she nodded her head up and down in long exaggerated strokes.
It appeared her concern has taken a backseat to her need, our need. There was a hotel next door to the restaurant and since it was getting close to normal check in time I went in and got a room while she drove her car around and then entered the hotel after me and went to the room.
I opened the door when she knocked and once inside we embraced and almost clawed each other as we kissed and started to tear each others clothes off.
It has been a little while for me plus I wanted Cindy really bad. She was hot for sure but the naughtiness of it all I think was the biggest turn on for me. What is better than naughty, depraved, forbidden love/sex plus having feelings for her as well........I wanted to cum so deep inside her so bad I couldn't stand it.
With clothes stripped we fell onto the bed and continued to pull, rub, squeeze and roll on each other until we had to breath then we pulled away from each other,
"FUCK ME", she said.
I was extremely hard and just aching to get inside of her. We never said it but this was going to be a "quickie" as we both just needed relief.
I rolled on top of her and reached down to grab myself and aim it at her dripping cunt then plunged in,
"UGH, Uh, UH, UH" she grunted as I forced my throbbing meat straight in until I hit bottom then started quickly fucking in and out of her.
"Oh god this feels so good", I moaned out while I pumped.
"HARDER, FUCK ME HARDER", she she said desperately.
I raised myself up off of her and got onto my knees a little more and began to thrust faster and deeper as she loudly grunted, screamed and moaned.
She raised her arms over her head to place them against the headboard while I pounded into her. I felt like I just couldn't get in as deep as I wanted, the feeling was so incredible that I wanted to expand that feeling even more and she wanted it to so Cindy raised her legs back more and had her knees on her chest but she wasn't done,
"Let me put my legs up", she said.
I eased back and she placed her ankles on my shoulders, I leaned back over her and thrust straight in,
"OHHHH BABY", I groaned. The feel of her cunt wrapped around the lowest portion of my hardened shaft and the squishy sounds from our deeper fucking sent me into a frenzy.
I rammed into her with reckless abandoned and gave an extra hard shove at the as I bottomed out with each thrust which elicited what sounded like painful grunts and panting while I felt my cock washed in scorching liquid.
He hot jizz was gushing from her cunt and with my pounding made the sloshing slapping sound from the incredible wetness.
That was what I needed, she had gotten off and now I concentrated on myself let to come to a boil.
I began to groan as the feeling of cum shooting up my shaft made my cock tingle, my head feel light and the sweet feeling of anticipated relief cause me to work harder to bring it on.
I knew this was going to be big, I hadn't masterbated the whole week I have been gone and now to be her with Cindy in a hotel out of town, Amy waiting for me, Brad out of town and I am going to spray my cum inside this hot sexy married woman. I didn't even attempt to hold back at all, I couldn't do it if I wanted or needed to. I simply began to squirt,
"OHHHHHH, OHHHHHHH, OHHHHHHH, OHHHHHH", I moaned and moaned with each convulsion. I finally stopped pumping and held my cock deep inside if Cindy's quivering cunt while I continued to squeeze and convulse in what I knew was dry heaves. I was spent but felt like I couldn't stop or even waited to stop.
The feeling was so intense I dreamed up being able to cum by the gallon just to experience the pleasure of sum coursing through my cock while I was deep in such a warm wet pussy.
Finally given out I pulled out, fell to the side and slumped beside Cindy. All the energy drained from my body I laid there like a slug while I tried to will coherence back into my head (the big head and the little head) because I felt that this was likely our last time together like this. Even without either of us saying it before I felt we both needed this "one more time" together to sustain the memory and confirm the enjoyment we derived from each other.
After laying there for awhile my mind drifted and I napped. I was totally wiped out from the intensity of it all and when I realized I had fell asleep I snapped back to attention, feeling like hours had passed even though it was less than an hour.
Cindy was breathing steadily, she was asleep. I scooted up behind her and reached over her to pull her to me which caused her to also snap back to the waking world,
"What time is it", she asked excitedly as she tried to sit up.
"Don't worry, it's been less than an hour", I said calmly.
She eased back down and let me hold her then after a few minutes she spoke,
David, you know that...........that we may be to transparent and........if we keep on we're going to get in trouble", she said.
I know, I know. We both know today is probably it", I said.
She squeezed my arm and let out a breath.
"Friends", she said in an asking tone.
"And then some", I said.
"Yes", she said.
We were acknowledging that we loved each other but our sessions had to stop however, we also knew it left a door open to future opportunity. This was the way we left it with each other when we parted. I let her leave ahead of me and I hung back in the room, took a shower, watched TV then left which assured I would be home tonight.
When I got home who do you think was waiting for me, Amy. Her still having the key to my place was another thing I had forgotten about.
She stopped me on the porch, grabbed me and hugged hard,
" I missed you so much", she said.
I wasn't expecting her to be here nor did I want her to be. I hugged her back and broke the hug while moving towards the door to get inside and unpack my stuff.
While I couldn't bring myself to fall back in with Amy I did get some revenge as it were but I wasn't intending to hurt her either. I had been thinking how do I cool things down with her and not have hurt feelings or rejection but in this case it wouldn't be as easy as it was between Cindy and I.
It was something on my mind while Amy and I talked. I desperately wanted to be alone tonight but she didn't make any attempt or indication that she was going to leave.
It was confirmed after awhile when we began to yawn and she asked if I was ready to go to bed. I wanted to turn my annoyance into opportunity because I was getting horny again and Amy was it and willing. Even though i knew it would be like confirming her hopes or even leading her on my hardening cock was justifying it.
We we got into bed Amy eased up to me, nuzzling her face into my chest she began to kiss while slowly working her way down. She duck her head under the covers and wasted no time taking my cock in her mouth and gently worked my tool.
I wasn't sure if it was her sucking alone that felt so sweet or the thought that I had fucked her friend hours ago and having both of these woman in the same day along with all the naughtiness all the way around was enhancing it but either way it felt good.
I closed my eyes and relaxed in bliss as she worked on me. I enjoyed the feeling I had and what she was giving me. I didn't feel the need to cum nor did I feel I had any in me. I felt like I spent every ounce I had into Cindy a few hours ago but if I was going to get some pussy then I wanted to be able to finish and have the satisfying feeling of cumming.
Amy pulled off of me and moved back up and laid on her back while I rolled on top of her, she reached down and guided me to her hole.
I eased into her and started slowly pumping in and out of her. Without the immediate need to cum I took my time and reveled at the feeling of her warm, wet, soft inner folds caressing my cock.
Neither of us made much sound other than barely audible grunts and moans while we had sex. I was enjoying the feeling of having sex with Amy yet I was not conveying or even feeling anything from her other than "we were simply having sex".
I knew she had more of an agenda than I did and maybe even more feelings than I did, despite was Cindy told me earlier about what her and Amy talked about.
With that though in my head my head I drifted back to the session that Cindy and I had earlier and with the whole wrong of it all I began to feel the heat and boiling in my balls.
I was feeling so depraved that I figured if I could just find me another woman that only wanted to have a physical relationship then I could have the variety a lot of men naturally grave.
Maybe even one of Amy's friends would be interested in just having sex, maybe there could be a threesome. The thought was bringing me on and in my mind I was fucking Cindy, then Amy then one of Amy's hot friends,
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH", I breathed out loud as held in deep and release a load of hot creamy spunk directly into Amy's womb.
With a few squeezes I knew it was all I had, empty once again I eased out slowly then Amy wrapped her arms around me and pulled me to her and kissed me,
"Oh baby, that was sweet, we're connecting on a higher level than we ever have", she said.
That killed my bliss and sent a feeling of guilt through me. If she knew what was in my head that really brought me off she would be crushed.
I didn't respond I just rolled to the side and stretched out. After a few minutes I rolled to my other side facing away from her and eventually went to sleep.
The party at Brad and Cindy's was tomorrow so I needed to get some sleep plus I needed it so I could restore my energy to think about the Amy situation and figure out an exit strategy.
When I woke the next morning Amy was gone, it was Saturday and I think she had to work today but I couldn't remember. I went into the kitchen and on the fridge was a note saying she was working until about 2 then would come back over.
Re-energized from a restful sleep and a new resolve I began to rehearse in my mind what I was going to say to Amy, what her potential responses would be, what my retorts would be and how I would hopefully ease each of us out of this "relationship".
I had worked on my resolve the whole time until Amy showed up. I didn't intend to say anything today before the party but she began to dig in with questions, concerns and inquired about my mood, silence and lack of responses to her expressions of missing me, love and connections on a higher level, etc.
As far as I was concerned the time was not appropriate but she was pressing pretty hard and gave me the opening I needed.
I started slowly then easily got on a roll with it. I let it, out all my feelings or rather the feelings I didn't have or couldn't have.
She went through the entire series of emotions from anger, to sadness, from hurt to resolve.
I knew how she felt because I had been through it and it hurts. Even though I gave it back to her before and on purpose I had my revenge and never panned to intentionally cause anymore hurt but it couldn't be helped.
I tried to get those feeling back and she tried to make me get the feeling back but it wasn't there. I felt bad about it and felt bad for her but it now came full circle.
Needless to say she wasn't up for the party this evening after all that transpired. I didn't want to go myself but I knew I had to. I know it's selfish but my thoughts went to "what am I going to do for sex now". I knew I would get into some kind of relationship at some point but it was the in between that I thought about.
Just like being gone for a week and not having it available, when you know it's not there it makes you want it or feel you can't live without it for 5 minutes.
The rest of the afternoon was a blur while I continually mulled over the events of our conversation. I found myself wondering if I was making a mistake by ending things with Amy. I think it was my little head doing the thinking and I just wanted to justify what I really didn't feel for her anymore just so I could have access to pussy.
I showed up at Brad and Cindy's house and entered into a room full of people. A lot of them I knew some of course I didn't. I went on with getting on with life. I worked the room and moved around checking out some of the woman and trying to chat up one or two of them.
Cindy and I caught a few glimpses of each other but we seemed to end up on opposite sides of the room while engaged in various conversations. We eventually found each other when I went towards the kitchen to get another drink, we moved to the side away from the others.
"Amy told me", said Cindy while looking at me to see my reaction.
"I swear I didn't intend for this to happen now but she opened the door and I couldn't hold back", I said.
"I'm sorry it didn't work out", she said.
"Well it was fine before I just couldn't even get the feeling back", I said.
"She admitted she screwed up", she said.
I just shook my head in agreement and as a gesture that there were no words I could add to that assessment.
Cindy seemed sad yet she had restrained jubilation. She seemed to be about to bust with something. She looked to the side to make sure nobody was close enough to hear her then leaned towards me,
"I'm pregnant", she whispered.
My eyes wide I looked at her and she beamed back at me.
"Who's is it", I whispered.
She just shrugged her shoulders like "I don't know" then parsed her lips like "and it doesn't matter".
My eyes narrowed and a smile formed on my face, she looked up at me and a smile grew on her face