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After a mixed response from you all here, i have decided to approach a friend who is good at grammar and language in general. She has agreed to help me and i will be meeting her almost every weekend, for months to come, unless i improve my storytelling skills in every way.
I know that i am not polished and appealing to the senses as other popular writers are, but i'm trying to improve the bits. I had shown an extract of my diary to a publisher, and he said that actually the raw, stripped down style of my writing appealed to him. But he also advised me to come back after some changes.
I would also like to tell you, that the stories you're reading here are amongst the foremost pages of my diary. Most of these have been written years ago when i was new to writing erotica and i have somewhat improved.
Patricia had left me for her boyfriend few weeks ago. One fine evening she confessed to me that she still had feelings for him, and was doubtful whether she was bi,
rather than being lesbian. It had been almost a month ever since i spent some time with my friends. I had been trying to keep myself preoccupied with my work schedule.
One weekend i decided to spend it with Bob who had been my friend since college. He was dating a nympho named Cynthia who was in her early twenties at that time.
Bob was aware of my being a lesbian, inspite of my promiscuous reputation in college. I had confessed to him that i didn't feel comfortable even talking with men, if
compared to talking to a straight girl, who wasn't interested in me any way at all.
That weekend i spent some time chatting with Bob and Cynthia at a Disco. I was an occassional drinker, so i didnt have any drinks at all, aside from a few sips of beer
. I was unaware of Cynthia's being a nympho. Bob brought his car so that me and Cynthia could sit inside, from the parking lot. Cynthia sat beside him in the front,
while i sat behind Cynthia. Bob had bought the car away on the road, when Cynthia made him pull it to a side and started kissing him. Both of them were horny from the
dancing and the result was they started rubbing their genitals against each other, inspite of being clothed. I smiled and asked them to continue it once they dropped
me off, and Bob understood. He even joked that i was afraid to see a man's cock since the last few years. We both knew it to be true.
"I am not afraid to see a woman's pussy, though.", Cynthia said. In fact she told me that it was her fantasy to be with another woman.
The next weekend i got a call from Bob who asked me to come to a restaurant. I was surprised to see him alone. I even teased him that if some of Cynthia's friends see
us, she would suspect him of cheating on her. Bob laughed heartily and told me that he was gonna ask me a favour. He was gonna take my help to let his girlfriend's
fantasy turn true. Initially i was not interested at all, i guess i was not over Patricia yet. But then, this wasn't anything serious, i thought.
Besides, i think i needed to live in the moment for the time being, i assured myself. Being too emotional had brought me to a sad moment.
Not that i was thinking that i had been wrong being faithful to Patricia, but i thought just one night with a stranger wasn't a serious take on my emotions.
Bob assured me that he wouldn't tell anyone else about it. And i knew him well, so that wasn't a problem.
Cynthia was a brunette, thought not too dark haired. Had a tanned skin. She was too skinny, just like i used to be when i was in my early 20s. She was shorter than me
by a few inches. She was the youngest woman i was gonna be with.
We had it planned. Bob was gonna be out of town and Cynthia was staying alone at his appartment that night. It was the night when she was expecting him to be back.
He always kept a spare key. I told Bob that i'm gonna close the door behind me once i enter, as making him see what we did was not my piece of cake.
Everything went as planned. Cynthia was sleeping in Bob's bedroom. The nightlamp she had lit was making her look sexy.
As i entered the room i closed the door behind me. It had been months now, since i had been with another woman. The only company i had got so far was my vibrator.
I stripped myself completely. Cynthia was sleeping with her back facing me, her legs on top of one another. She was wearing a nightie which covered her chest and
lower body upto the thighs.
I hesitated for a moment, as i knew what i was about to do was a bit creepy. But i had it talked with Bob, and he was ready waiting at his friends place to receive my
call, in case Cynthia panicked.
I put my bag down near the bed and climbed up on it. Cynthia was half asleep, thinking that i was her boyfriend. As i placed my fingers over her cunt, i understood
how horny she liked to be. She wasn't wearing any undies. She had her eyes closed when she let out her first moan as i started massaging her clit harder now.
I was waiting for her response, i slowly pulled her nightie over and started licking her cunt up and down. Then i put a finger inside. Cynthia had her legs opened a
bit for me as she came and i sucked her cunt dry.
I had tried to mimic what Bob had told me to, and he had been careful enough to describe me how she liked it to be. However, she could be scared from my further
caresses, so i told her it was me. She opened her eyes to reveal that she was shocked, but wasnt turned off. She gave me a smile and told me that i had done a
wonderful job. She also told me that Bob had hinted that he was planning on something like this, but it would be me and in such a way, she hadnt expected.
She stripped herself and pulled me on her. Then we started kissing each other. I'm a good kisser, but Cynthia was blowing me away with the passion. She had me gasping
for air as she sucked my tongue with hers. I couldn't believe that i was the first woman she was being with, as confessed by her moments ago.
She had me tightly hugged and was rubbing her melons on my boobs and was enjoying the sensation. Both of us had our eyes closed and we were moaning slowly.
Then she told me that she liked to be on top. I lied below her and she gave started running her feet on my nipples, as requested by me.
I saw her grin as my moans increased in volume and frequency. Then i told her that i had a surprise for her in the bag. I pulled out Patricia's strap on, the one which
she had been using on me and lately teaching me to use it on her.
I knew i was taking the chances, as someone too adventurous would allow herself to be penetrated by a strap on. But Bob had told me that Cynthia was a nympho and also
that she liked to try everything and anything. I had been careful to choose this one, as it was very small. Cynthia started at it for a moment, but welcomed it with a
naughty smile.
I took out the lube from my bag too and started smearing it on Cynthia's pussy. I had planned another surprise for her, but that was for later.
Once we knew Cynthia was well lubed, i rubbed this fake plastic cock on her cunt. It was already wet, but we ensured fair conditions. Cynthia was on top of me when she
grabbed it and guided it to her cunt. Once it was inside, i pulled her close and we started kissing as we thrust our hips towards each other with growing speed.
I deliberately didn't pull it out even when Cynthia said she was gonna cum and i figured she was like me. Once we were horny, it was difficult to satisfy our hunger
for sex and nothing was too much for us.
After she had cummed she gave me a deep kiss and thanked me. Then i told her that she will be doing me a favour.
I pulled out a vibe and a dildo from the bag. I lied on all my fours exposing my cunt and asshole to Cynthia. She brought her nose close to it, and smelled me, closing
her eyes. Then i told her to use the lube on me.
First she fingered me vigorously to make me hornier while she applied the lube. I helped her pour enough of it into my crack, and she loved what she was doing.
Then i pushed the dildo into my cunt while i gave her the vibe to stuff it into my asshole.
Within few seconds, both my holes were filled with these toys, though only 1/3rd of them was inside me.
Gently i started moving my dildo, while she switched on the vibe. I was numbed from the sensations i was getting.
I needed to be felt dommed, so i had given her the control to the vibe, and it worked magnificently in my ass.
I had my eyes closed and within few minutes both the toys were inside me completely.
I cummed once but neither i felt like stopping nor Cynthia stopped.
I was acting crazy, specially the way i moved my hips around the toys, specially the vibe in the ass.
Cynthia surprised me by sucking on my ear and increasing the vibe to its full speed.
I couldnt control the pleasure and the pain and i discharged large amount of cum on the toys and this was what Cynthia was waiting for, the second orgasm.
Within seconds she pulled and helped me take out both the toys out of my holes. She looked at me with lust while she sucked on the vibe which was inside my ass.
I gave her a similar look while sucking on the dildo and licking my cum off it.
As opposed to what my body wanted, this was my sole time having fun with her in months to come.

anonymous readerReport

2013-04-15 17:15:54
Oy, this story is shite, I'd rather suck me dogs bollocks than read this drivel.


2013-04-13 05:01:57
Hmm, why won't all those negative comments never be written by not anonymous readers...? It's easy to pick on someone while staying in the shade... One more thing: why won't you write the story yourself if you think it's this easy. Even sharing the true events is hard enough and beeing critical is even harder. If you stand by what you say you should just have the courage to do it openly...

And as for me... I liked it. Maybe there are some grammar mistakes and maybe there is a lack of paragraphs but i liked it a lot and it wasn't a bother. I'm not native english and I make many mistakes myself. Also I can't write well enough to post the stories therefore I so enjoy reading them... And looking down at my pants I can say: yup, I enjoyed it, there's no denying :p

Looking forward to read your next stories,

peace and love ;)

anonymous readerReport

2013-04-12 05:28:46
Aaaah, as always, so nice to see people being kind, helpful and cheering up the writers. After all, it's not like it's voluntary to read these stories.

anonymous readerReport

2013-04-11 22:24:00
Your writing has not improved one bit!!! There are still many spelling errors and at times you are not not able to write in the proper tense. This is just as sloppy as your previous works. Maybe the publisher meant your work was "raw" because its not even close to being done. Your writing is raw like a steak that was ordered well done, meaning unfinished and not correct. You need a reality check, your work is so far from being publishable that its not even funny!!! Wake up and smell the coffee, your work is inferior even on this site, much less publishable.


2013-04-11 20:46:28
intresting if a bit raw I look foward to reading your other works young lady you have a passion I enjoy

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