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Introduction:

Ally decides to have sex with Caleb, just to start a family. Constructive criticism for part 2!
There is nothing in this empty house. This quiet house. Let me introduce myself. My name is Caleb, I'm nineteen. My girlfriends name is Ally, and she is 18. Her birthday was two weeks ago, as mine was seven months ago.

Ally and I decided to move into a house together. Ally's dad finally let her after I had to show him how good I was for her. Her father made me do a lot of things, like, I had to be able to buy a car, have a reasonable job, and more importantly now, buy a house-in which case I did.

Now that we have this house, a two bedroom, one bathroom, single family home, we needed to get unpacked. Standing in the living room, I walked out the door, smelling like glue and wood, out to my red ford truck to bring our brand new couches and our brown chair out of the back carriage. I leaned over, slid a tannish couch towards me with my hands, and had a repairmen help me with the other side of the couch when something split into my foot, it felt like a large needle.

I dropped the large couch onto the ground, the repairman still holding onto it, and picked up my foot with both hands, hopping on one foot. I look down at my foot and realized it was a nail, sticking out from the bottom of my, brown work boot. I quickly sat on the pavement of the driveway and studied it.

"What the fuck," I yelled while staring at my wound with the nail still in it, "I have a fucking nail in my foot, Ally."

I saw Ally run to me out the front door with a cardboard box in her hands up to her chest and as soon as she got to me she dropped the box, exposing her cleavage left from her breasts as they were smashed together because of her arms holding my foot looking at my wounded foot.

"Are you okay, Caleb?" She asked me soft and kind, almost as if she were hurt too. Her cleavage was still hanging out. I could almost see a nipple. If her red tank top and blonde, wavy hair would move out of the way, I may be able to see it.

"How about looking at it from a different angle?" I asked her. I was hoping she would turn even the slightest bit so I could see a tit.
She moved to a different angle but that made the nipple disappear into her shirt somewhere.

Suddenly, she turned, flinging her long curls onto her back. And now, I could definitely see that big titty I have been expecting.

Ally and I have never had sex before. Although I want to, she wants to stay a virgin a little longer. I have to admit, I am not a virgin. I had sex with a girl in 10th grade, it was great, but I wasted my time on her. She had short, like a bob styled haircut, brown hair. I loved how her tits bounced as I hit her jiggly ass. But that's all over now.

"Caleb, I have never felt like this before." She told me, her nipple all squashed out for me to see.

"Ally, what's wrong?" I asked her. I was very shocked. I thought she was going to faint.

"Caleb... Ohhh... Caleb... I think I am turned on by your foot," she laughed. I laughed too because the thought of her getting turned on by something that a lot of girls don't like to be turned on by. But my foot? Wow. I wonder if she did this other times and I just didn't know about it.

"I think I'm turned on too." I whispered in her ear.

"C'mon, let's go inside." She giggled like she was so horny, like a porn star wanting the cock in her mouth, or when she would want it in her pussy. Her giggle sounded like the one when the guys dick was dig in her tight pussy and the girl would giggle to let her guy know
she was enjoying it.

We both walked inside our new house but nothing happened. Everything was normal. Ally sat on the couch and opened up a book that was resting up on the arm, and my cat was sleeping on the red sofa. Nothing unusual. I guess Ally really did want to save everything she had.

I saw down on a new chair a man put down in my living room about an hour ago, resting my hurt foot. I looked at my foot and noticed the nail wasn't in my foot anymore. No wonder I could walk. I limped though.

Ally was sitting on the couch I had dropped when the nail was in my foot. Man, that person who brang that animal in here had to be strong. I didn't notice him even pass by.

A man walked in the room with a wooden coffee table and set it down in front of me.

"Here, use this for your foot." He demanded.

"Thanks," I replied looking at my foot while putting it on the coffee table. The man nodded, walked out of the room and disappeared out of the doorway. I looked over at Ally. Twirling her hair with one hand, and biting the pointer finger while biting it smiling, she was looking straight in my eyes.

"Caleb, I have made my decision." Ally told me, standing straight up, looking down at me on the couch.

"What the hell are you talking about?" I asked her. I looked up at her.

"I want to make a baby with you. I want to start our own family, Caleb. Do you?" She asked me. I was wide eyed about the fact she wants to lose her virginity to me. I got so horny, a fire went through my body.

"Of course." I replied back. Wow. I was so shocked. "When do you want to start?"
6 comments

Anonymous readerReport 

2015-07-12 14:28:37
I want to read more! Yes; it started slow, but I rather like a good story that takes a long, meandering path (instead of wham-bham thank you maam). Thank god it's not like every other story; it's certainly not predicasble :) and it made me wonder what's coming!!

Anonymous readerReport 

2014-10-18 16:43:16
I tried to be very supportive and detailed! A good story does not have the main conflict in the first chapter, okay? Now thank you!

Don'sdickReport 

2014-10-18 06:16:57
Please remember... any criticism is meant to help the story and/or the writer. Even those comments that seem cruel should be taken as constructive. I.E. 'LOL wtf was that'.. it simply means that the reader was disappointed in what he/she read. Everyone has a first story. Everyone writes a bad story. Please don't get too disappointed and quit writing. On the other hand, don't push too fast. Read your story, re-read your story. Change anything that doesn't seem to be right. If you plan to write a story in more than one chapter, label it as being 'chapter 1', etc. You're only 19. You can edit as many times as you want. When you reach the point that you have written something which you would enjoy reading, then post it. Good luck and (just like I tell my girlfriend when she has my cock in her mouth) Don't stop now!

Anonymous readerReport 

2014-10-17 11:45:02
The only thing more baffling than the story itself is the fact that somebody actually gave it a thumbs up.

Anonymous readerReport 

2014-10-17 05:11:07
LOL wtf was that

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