| 2005-09-21 17:06:35 |
Doing my niece
|
more ..more ....9/10 |
| 2005-09-21 17:29:07 |
Doing my niece
|
good little story and i'd like to see a threeway with susie |
| 2005-09-21 18:05:20 |
Doing my niece
|
To hell with the mistakes. It was a good story. You got in too much of a hurry at the end though. There were a couple of more pages of sex to be had. (Did they ever actually hang up the phone?) Do the whole double space and indent thing, that will help a lot. The dialogue was actually pretty well done. Keep writing. |
| 2005-09-21 19:19:26 |
Doing my niece
|
Yeah!! more of the phone thing, good story line, and sexily written. Write more, and u gotta 10 |
| 2005-09-22 01:10:13 |
Doing my niece
|
good story, your spelling sucks though 9/10 |