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Introduction:

Adam Nicholas Mihelich, at your service, how may I make your days and nights from now? The pleasure is all mine to meet you.

1600 Pennsylvania Ave. Washington District of Columbia

Oval Office:

Me: Madam President, how are you coming along at signing the bill that hit your desk this afternoon?

You: I am a little reluctant to sign without fully understanding some of the boilerplate and technical jargon, yet I'm getting that oh so familiar itch.

Me: That's highly inappropriate and besides, this desk has probably seen its fair share of christenings. Voters are looking forward to your speech you have been drafting up for tomorrow

You: Well, maybe my chief of staff can do his fucking job a bit more patriotically! Did you really think first man was going to be just peachy with me? So make yourself useful and start writing my memoirs. Any pipe dreams you had gallivanting around D.C. with a bimbo assistant on one arm and a floozy administrator on the other are null and void at this point. We have kids to set an example for heaven's sake.

Me: Roger (takes pants down to ankles)

You: Oh God you already have a hard on! Don't think I forgot why I married you for a hot second. Still, it takes only a moment for you to pull out that trouser snake and get this juicy and wet like a couple of horny teenagers again.

Me: Truly I am a blessed soul to get to munch on that sweet pussy before making another miracle with you.

You: Look at this sweet candy ass I've got for you, Adam.

Me: Soon I'll toss it, before I boss it. What's the rush, honey?

You: (we start to 69) Oh you are a magician. And, I love the the way your tongue feels on my twat as I try to throat your magnificent tool all the way down to your balls.

Me: Kayla, did you just come that quick?

You: You like facials, wow. Return the favor tonight after Designated Survivor, ok?

Me: That show sucks, let's watch west wing or...

US: Jack Ryan! jinx!

You: Sextopia has got a plethora of healthy, fit individuals?

Me: (boning begins) I call this position 52!

You: Do Me Doggy!

Me: Yeah right, ok... Get on all fours!

You: Wisecracker eh?

Me: Who you calling a cracker? You people never learn a God damn thing, do you?

You: 'You People'? What's that supposed to mean, now?

Me: (you turn from reverse cowgirl to cowgirl) I Just wanted to see that Sweet Texas face to my ugly duck mug.

You: You know I'm half Japanese, half Irish, and half Hawaii native X?

Me: Awesome, 150% crazy sexy & xxxy! I'm feeling more or less lucky if that was even purportedly realistically practically feasibly magically delicious or complex.

You: (female orgasm sounds(myth) as you lean back and show off that perfect torso and bust.) Oh my God-daddy I'm coming! Awww! Oh! Aw! Ohh! Aww! Ohhh!

Awww! Thank You My Love!

Me: (bucks you off me) shotgun, set... hut hut... go deep!

You: What the fuck, I want a cream pie, God damn it!

Me: (shoots a torrent of baby batter your ways) Touchdown! Right on that third eye of yours... wait for it... (dribbles down face, tits, belly, into lovely sweet cunt. 2 point conversion success! Still the greatest!

You: Challenge!

Kids: (storm into oval office) Gross! Is there a room in this God damn white house you two haven't swapped fluids?

Me: Language, young lady and man! Since you're here can we get a ruling from are favorite two children?

Kids: Dad! I'm probably traumatized for life now seeing you cover Mom with all that jazz.

You: No, I think you mean jizz, kiddo.

Me: Aww crap, some got on this amendment to the constitution of the united states of america.

Kids: When's the divorce already?

You: Your father would die before signing such a dissolution of our love. The sanctity of holy matrimony cannot ever be devalued in his mind by getting a divorce or his entire Roman Catholic core values he would start to question; afterwards, his moral high ground would crumble and his ethically superior mindset he would question, then his standards for excellence at a minimum would ultimately give rise to mediocrity like the rest of rat racers out there and he would then accept the human condition as an inevitability and succumb to his baser instincts before his education and intellect compounding mistake after mistake spiraling beyond oblivion toward total annihilation, extinction, or limp weenies for ALL.

Kids: Wow Mom, you've been drinking too much of Dad's Kool-Aid!

ALL of US: xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

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