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Comments from READER
Date | Story title | Comment |
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2004-10-11 10:27:05 | Part 21: Retelling | Tell me what you think... I did start Episode 2, and i got 4 parts done, then i decided that i didn't want to go as far into the future as that, so i pushed those four back, and restarted episode II. So those 4 parts will either follow up the end of episode II, or they will be the end of episode II. Tell me what you think about this one |
2004-10-11 15:39:17 | Part 21: Retelling | need to edit it more before you submit... story was good but semi incoherent. |
2004-10-12 15:04:49 | Part 21: Retelling | okay story, but it was unclear who was speaking. In the first parts of the story, John is the story teller, now Holly is telling the story from her point of view as well. Unclear at times who was doing what to who. I thought John had went bi a couple of times. |
2004-10-12 15:34:48 | Part 21: Retelling | Whenever there is a ... it is not just a new paragraph, it is either a skip in time, or switching characters, i tried to make it clear early in each new paragraph who we were with. Whenever the two are seperated it switches between them. |
2004-10-15 15:51:01 | Part 21: Retelling | Hey man, Ive read all over the stories. I cant w8 for episode 2, great ideas and just because the writing is a little weird doesnt mean that it doesnt make sense. I found it quite easy to tell who was who. Another Great story John. |