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Comments from READER
| Date | Story title | Comment |
|---|---|---|
| 2005-06-16 15:12:06 | Oh No....Oh Fuck....Here we go! part 2. | Lame. Confusing. And illierate |
| 2005-06-16 20:12:08 | Oh No....Oh Fuck....Here we go! part 2. | That was awesome!! You should definately make a part 3. I'm curious to see whether or not Hara gets involved. ^_^ |
| 2005-06-18 10:57:08 | Oh No....Oh Fuck....Here we go! part 2. | It took a little bit to figure out the cast....the way you switched between shara and hara...even though you explained it, I had to reread this another time to figure it out, and to me that took away from the story. other than that the story was good, But I would have thought it would have been better and less confusing if you had just used the one name. I realize when it is done by mistake and can go on reading, and get into the story. So not to sound redundant, i'll let it be. I give it a 07/10 |
| 2005-08-09 12:57:46 | Oh No....Oh Fuck....Here we go! part 2. | Illiterate, Normous? It's like the pot calling the kettle black....Damn...slip some grammar in there, too, Norm... Anyways, I thought it was interesting. You still forgot the gray eyes....I do agree with Doc that you could have just focused on one name for Sahara. Also, you might want to put paragraphs in an organized way. For example, try to start a seperate paragraph when the characters are doing something else to their partner. That probably sounds a little complicated, but trust me, it's a lot easier to read when you do it. I say....7/10 |
| 2005-12-30 05:37:11 | Oh No....Oh Fuck....Here we go! part 2. | Man, I had a tough time following the dots and connect them. That's not good. Bad writing style. 2/10 |