| 2006-05-12 22:21:48 |
Carla_(1)
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Dude-you must have read the book "Writing Porno for Dummies." You got every porn cliche in your story. Example-"as she became more used to the girth of my sword in her ass." Can't you do any better than that? |
| 2006-07-03 05:53:12 |
Carla_(1)
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ok the starting and plot were good but for the actuall sex parts you used way too many adjectives and analigys(hehe ANALigys) overall a decent story 6/10 |
| 2006-04-12 19:17:59 |
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he is a very nice doctor |
| 2006-04-12 22:36:30 |
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very good story, The best iv read So far. |
| 2006-04-13 05:17:35 |
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hi it was the best ever ive read |