| 2007-01-15 04:00:09 |
Magic Wands (so to speak) parts 1, 2, and 3
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Good draft, now edit. Try adding in non-erotic details (wedding dress, rooms, descriptions of people's looks, etc.) to make for a piece of art rather than a jack-off tale. All in all a superb draft! |
| 2007-01-24 15:31:54 |
Magic Wands (so to speak) parts 1, 2, and 3
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ok, i liked it, it made me cum, but u need paragraphs and for gods sake, you said harry had a pussy. what the fuck? read over it before you post it! |
| 2007-01-30 17:42:35 |
Magic Wands (so to speak) parts 1, 2, and 3
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very nice i hope the next book iz sumthing like thiz |
| 2007-02-01 10:23:20 |
Magic Wands (so to speak) parts 1, 2, and 3
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Have you heard of paragraphs? Spacing? |
| 2007-02-28 23:57:04 |
Magic Wands (so to speak) parts 1, 2, and 3
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harry potter eh? sorta kinky..wella lot kinky coz yeah...harry potter.be ashamed |