| 2007-12-05 02:31:46 |
Competition
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Great job! |
| 2008-01-12 00:35:35 |
Competition
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I read this a while ago and don't know why i didn't comment on it then. Great story, right up my alley. |
| 2007-06-26 09:23:52 |
My Sex Life Chapter four (My First Marrage
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continue the story with a sexual encounter wirh her mom. good story, keep writing. |
| 2007-06-26 20:43:48 |
My Sex Life Chapter four (My First Marrage
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damn that was a good story but you need to get back with mom so she can stay happy 10/10 |
| 2007-06-27 05:34:56 |
My Sex Life Chapter four (My First Marrage
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Didn't get psst about the 7th paragraph. I dislike reading something that is so poorly written even though the content is good. You should go back to reread, rewrite, and take into consideration that you have to use the correct grammar, the correct punctuation, and correct English. It's easy to do. With the two other readers, they seem to think that as long as there are blowjobs and fucking in a story that it makes for a good story. It takes more than that. I gave it a 4/10. A rewrite would get a 9 or a 10. |