| 2005-12-11 23:54:39 |
bus trip_(1)
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yea ....... how the hell did his cock manage to get out of micheals pants??? wtf? we all deserve an explanation! leir! |
| 2005-12-22 09:46:28 |
bus trip_(1)
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how the fuck does his cock get out of his pant are they baggy and have afucking rip in his boxer or what explain that shit its anooying be clueless specially when its a true story ( maybe not sure) too un reasonale |
| 2005-12-25 11:32:54 |
bus trip_(1)
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not bad at all.i just about fell out of my chair laughing at the atart. |
| 2006-01-29 13:39:55 |
bus trip_(1)
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the plot was good but you need to expand on the backgrounds and explain also how things or situations come to be n your story. like one of the other readers posted , how did they cime to be in a position to where his erection entered her? such omisions leave the work sadly devoid of "backbone". there should be insight in to the characters. other than that i would sat that you have promise to turn into something more. 6/10 |
| 2006-02-28 11:42:37 |
bus trip_(1)
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i cumed all over myself. awsome story |