| 2006-11-07 19:05:43 |
Hiking in the Mountains
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ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... |
| 2006-11-07 21:06:12 |
Hiking in the Mountains
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Not Bad man but the insect part, just drop it. |
| 2006-11-10 02:56:27 |
Hiking in the Mountains
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Okay he doesn't need negative posts and comments he needs comments that will help his writing. Okay you did awesome on the story plot, could have added a part where he got part and his mother had to look after him or vice versa also break up your sentances into bigger paragraphs and try making more room by adding more space between the paragraphs it makes it easier on the eye. Also if possible make seperate chapter sheets its long really good though buts its still long. Nice spelling too and grammer I didn't see too many spelling mistakes. |
| 2006-11-10 12:01:38 |
Hiking in the Mountains
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WOW.I'm still sitting with a raging erection. Some of your commenters are missing the point,If it's sexy and horny nothing else matters. |
| 2006-11-10 14:05:40 |
Hiking in the Mountains
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FAGGOT |