2007-10-10 01:32:12 |
Sandra's Big Nipple Brassiere
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I saw the humor you were portraying and found it somewhat amusing. as for it being in a 'true story' catagory i feel it being misplaced and should be under 'humorous.' webber |
2007-10-11 00:09:06 |
Sandra's Big Nipple Brassiere
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shitty |
2008-02-15 20:20:47 |
Sandra's Big Nipple Brassiere
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THIS SHIT HAPPENS to me al the time,Wot a life .My Burning |
2007-10-09 06:36:12 |
FORBIDDEN FRUIT (1)
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wonderful 10/10 |
2007-10-09 09:04:45 |
FORBIDDEN FRUIT (1)
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A very good story. Now I know this is going to sound like nit-picking, but you should proof-read your work often to be sure that you haven't missed a detail. Believe me, I know as I have been called on it myself. Early on, you state that while Kimie was undressing, she threw her bra across the room, yet in the next paragraph you state that you were right in your assumption that she was braless under her pink shirt. I'm betting it was just a slip when you did the final draft. I have read a good bit of your work and I like it. Keep it up and re-read a bit more before you post. 9/10 |