| 2005-11-28 01:57:38 |
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Pretty good story. Like someone else said, it ended to soon. Put in a little more detail and you got it. I give it an 8. Keep writing... preferably part 2. |
| 2005-11-28 02:00:48 |
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I almost forgot, hey Matt, who are you to say it sucked? Wheres your stories? Huh? Thats what I thought. Shut up. |
| 2005-11-28 22:09:18 |
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Yea, they are right, endid a bit too soon. There needs to be some stuff after the climax (or orgasm, in these such stories). Your works are good, you just need to have a bit more after the climax of the story. Keep writing, and I would like to see maybe a part 2, or even more, maybe? |
| 2005-11-29 02:51:09 |
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All i have to say is if u could have only put more time into it, it might have been a better story! i gotta agree its basically a sister fucks brother stroy with sister's friend...... could have more detail into it then you put into it! |
| 2005-11-29 21:35:05 |
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hey lady, it was an awesome story, you need a sequel. It ends a little too soon, but its pretty good. try using paragraphs next time, other then that it was great! |