| 2007-05-30 17:04:30 |
teen vampires undead and horney
|
good but it was hard to tell when it switched between tht guy and the girl. There was really no obvious switch. |
| 2007-05-30 20:18:20 |
teen vampires undead and horney
|
it was good, just write more and sexier. |
| 2007-05-30 22:41:20 |
teen vampires undead and horney
|
I would have to disagree with the other comments I thought this was very lacking and the grammar, though that may not be most important, was horrendous. The transitions were easy enough to catch on to, but I strongly encourage proof reading before loading onto site. I liked the concept, but the lack luster attempt at expansion on it was disapointing. 0.o |
| 2007-07-15 16:21:04 |
teen vampires undead and horney
|
no need to switch between people just tell one side |
| 2007-07-18 04:02:48 |
teen vampires undead and horney
|
a good overall story but no need to switch chars |